Yes or no

Chapter 42 The Middle Past 41

Chinese people like to have a lively reunion, so whether it is Mid-Autumn Festival, Dragon Boat Festival, or the beginning of the first half of the month, we want a large family to get together in harmony, and of course, it is even more so on New Year's Eve.

An Ning lives in a small town.During the month of Chinese New Year, people who wandered back and forth and worked hard all over the country flocked home, and the crowds in shopping malls and supermarkets speaking various local accents were filled with the happiness that can only be found in their hometown.An Ning sat on a bench in the pedestrian street, seeing the relaxed faces on their faces, she just felt that people are really strange.In a year, traffic jams are probably only during the Chinese New Year. The spacious roads are full of traffic jams, and people don’t care much. They are stuck in the car and have a rare time to talk.Du Yun accompanies An Yan and An Ning to buy clothes, New Year's routine, and the means of dismissing children. Du Yun has used it for 20 years at once, and it is really difficult to correct it for a while.Anyway, An Ning and An Yan are both children in her eyes, it doesn't matter whether they are pleasing or not, they are the two children she gave birth to after being pregnant for ten months.

Those years that have already passed are not important anymore, only the days to come are worth seeing.

Du Yun hadn't had the energy to prepare for the New Year for many years, and it seemed that he had saved all his brains for many years and put it into the present moment.

The house was completely painted inside and out, the white walls even dazzled the eyes, but Du Yun liked it.All the bricks and trees in the yard were replaced with new ones, except for the lonely cherry tree in the middle of the yard.An Yan was holding a cup of black tea, steaming hot, sitting on the window sill watching Du Yun who couldn't stop busy in the yard, then turned his head and asked, "Tell me, is this a complication of menopause? She doesn't have a man to mess with, so she just messes with this yard. Do you want to push her to find a wife?"

An Yan's mouth is really getting worse and worse, and he doesn't know who he followed.Judging from Du Yun's posture, he was probably really preparing to meet someone.This courtyard seems to have never been visited by anyone, but people keep leaving and coming back, and some people leave and never come back.

"Of course you who have a girlfriend don't know the pain of being single." An Yan glanced at Du Yun's figure, guessing that such a big change in her should be a good thing.An Ning gave him a blank look, lowered her hair and sent a message to An Nannan, "What are you doing?"

The yard is full of colorful lights, and there are a pair of red lanterns at the door.In the blink of an eye, Du Yun tidied up the inside and outside, and it was almost the end of the year, New Year's Eve.

Du Yun was answering the phone early in the morning. After breakfast, he answered no less than twenty calls back and forth.An Ning and An Yan are full of doubts. This family has always been isolated from the world, so how can there be so many connections.Du Yun put down the phone and explained during the meal that he was a relative of her natal family.beaming. For more than 20 years, An Ning and An Yan heard Du Yun talk about their natal family for the first time.Thinking of the relatives who came to the house to recognize relatives before, it is estimated that Du Yun was re-accepted by her natal family.Now there are only An Shaolin's relatives who haven't shown up, anyway, and An Shaolin is nowhere to be seen, let alone relatives.Not seeing does not mean not having.Having received a firm materialistic education, the way of nature, An Shaolin, cannot come from nowhere, nor can he "live forever" like the lighthouse jellyfish. At the very least, An Ning knows one of his relatives. Of course, the truth remains to be seen.

After a busy day, the New Year's Eve dinner was finally served on time.At seven o'clock in the evening, every house is brightly lit.An Yan leaned on the door frame and sighed, "It's Chinese New Year, and I'm one year older. Mom, do you think it's time for me to get married and have children?"

An Ning found it funny.

The water is boiling in the pot, and the dumplings are ready.Set up three pairs of bowls and chopsticks on the table.Three people occupy a large table, the dishes are full, and the people are sparse, only six of them are gathered by the shadows.It was rare for three people to eat together, and Du Yun also filled three glasses with wine.An Yan's eyes signaled An Ning, "Look, something is up!"

There is indeed something.

"Both my father and mother are dead. That's why the younger brothers finally dared to contact me." Du Yun drank a glass of bitter wine, revealing the past in a rare way. "I thought they had forgotten me. After so many years, I seem to have forgotten it too. Finally, I remembered it. People, they are just torturing themselves."

"How did I find you for so many years?" An Yan's concern was unstable.

"Stupid child!" Du Yun chuckled twice, "As long as you are alive, how can you not have any traces? If you want to find someone, it's so easy to find someone now."

An Ning's heart beat faster, and the headache hit again.Yes, who can live in this world without a trace, especially in the Internet age

After three glasses of wine, Du Yun began to tell stories.

"At that time, I was a sophomore in college." Du Yun put down his wine glass and chopsticks, fixed his eyes on the corner of the sofa behind An Ning, and told a story.

"You went to college and then ran to such a remote place to grow apples." An Yan was surprised.

"Yeah. I'm about 21 in my sophomore year of college. Because the discipline at home is strict, everything is arranged by the parents without any surprises. I have always come here like this, so I never feel that there is anything wrong with it. The environment made many people envious. But when I was young, I always felt that I had my own world, and I had to choose my own path. My heart was wild, but I never dared to do things out of line. Second, it was the first time I saw his article from the school newspaper. His name seemed familiar. He was good at writing and delicate in thought. He should be a gentle and rational person, and then I secretly followed his article. It’s like you are chasing stars now, probably I have followed for more than a year and never thought of seeing a real person. Really, I have never been curious about his appearance. I simply like his articles and poems, and describe his appearance and character with his words.

Not long after the beginning of the junior year, the students organized a fellowship, together with other departments, a total of 60 people. I was dragged by the girl in the dormitory to participate, and I was not happy at the time.The students in the university at that time usually studied hard, but they were crazy when they played around.That was the first time I saw him, in a crowd.They were all dancing, in pairs, and he was sitting in a corner, chatting with another boy.The music was turned up so loud I couldn't hear what they were saying, and then I saw him smiling and blushing.That person left, he followed him with his eyes, and I stood here, looking at each other for the first time.That moment was really, hehehe, that moment was really... "What is it, Du Yun didn't say it. An Yan stared round his eyes and waited to hear the continuation of the story.

"He turned his head away quickly. At that time, boys like to have long hair and curl it into big curls. He is not, he has short hair, clean and crisp, and the profile of his face is like that kind of artistic silhouette. Never talked about it At that moment when I was in love, there seemed to be a voice telling me that he was love. It was love at first sight, it could be considered love at first sight. The tutor I received told me not to sit next to him, not to talk to him, but at that moment my heart was beating wildly, what? I couldn’t listen to the advice. I sat next to him, separated by a chair, about [-] centimeters away. His hands rested on the chair, and patted the rhythm with the music. i'mdyinginemotion, it'smyworldinfantasy, i'mlivinginmydreams , you'remyheart, you'remysoul..." Du Yun tapped out the beat lightly on the table, lightly singing a certain song.

"At that time, I felt that the environment, music, lighting, and dancing crowd were just right. It was just the two of us sitting, looking at the noisy crowd, but I felt extremely peaceful. I couldn't help but secretly glanced at him, thinking that he was like a real poet, There was a poetic melancholy about him. It occurred to me that I knew him, had seen him long ago, even spoken to him, even experienced that moment. It was a strange feeling. But I can be sure that I knew He has been around for a long time. For old friends who have known each other for a long time, it is natural to say hello and greetings. After a while, I just wanted to say hello, when I heard someone in the crowd shouting "Shaolin, An Shaolin, come, take a photo for us ! "I don't know when the music stopped. The crowd lined up and stopped dancing for a long time. They chatted in pairs, and the atmosphere was subtle. He let out a sigh, took out a camera from the table behind him, and walked away. I went to the crowd to take pictures of them. It turned out that my name was An Shaolin, and he was the person in the school newspaper. God’s will? I really thought that at the time.

He took a lot of photos that night, group photos, single photos, but he was not included in so many.

When the party was over, it occurred to me that I did know him.I have met countless times in the past three years, because we belong to the same department, and have met countless times in large and small events. I used to be at the next table in class, and I passed by the library many times. In the first year of school He also helped me with my luggage.But fate is so wonderful.Classmates of three years have never paid attention to each other, but they really met in a friendship with other departments.

That's how we got to know each other.I said to him, "My name is Du Yun, we belong to the same department!" He said, yes, I know.

Hehe, I feel like a deer is running around in my heart right now, thinking wildly, it turns out that he has noticed me a long time ago, it turns out that he has liked me a long time ago.He sent me back to the dormitory. When I was downstairs, I stood on tiptoe and kissed his face, then ran back to the dormitory quickly, not daring to look back at his reaction.My heart was going to jump out of my throat, but I was so happy that I could fly.

I stood behind the curtain and peeked, trying to see his back pass my window.Couples who were in love at that time liked to pass by each other's windows, classrooms they had been to, and desks and chairs they had made, intentionally or unintentionally.People of our generation were not as emotional as you are now.I've never been so bold in my life, and I don't know where the courage came from

After waiting for a while behind the curtains, I saw him standing under the window, with his head raised, and shouted my name with a look of embarrassment on his face.The front, rear, left, and right dormitories all opened their windows and poked their heads out to see the excitement.The girl in our dormitory smiled and asked him why he was looking for Du Yun. He just said, can you ask her to come down?

I probably floated downstairs, involuntarily and out of control.He blushed first, stretched out his hand, and handed me my schoolbag, which I forgot completely.I don't remember what he said, but at that time, I really wanted to find a crack in the ground to get in, and felt ashamed.I still saw his back passing by my window that day, because I was standing behind him.The night wind was still a bit cold, not to mention it was early autumn.He glanced back, and I immediately floated back upstairs again. The people who watched the excitement dispersed and the windows were closed.

That is love.Love at first sight comes on so fast that I can't fight back, and I have no intention of resisting at all.

Later, we always run into each other.On the way to get out of class, when eating in the cafeteria, in the library, in front of the window of my dormitory.We got acquainted.During that time, I was really blissfully blissful, and his every move seemed to declare that he also liked me.He was wonderfully gentle, kind, and honest.He was quiet, he liked to laugh, he blushed easily, he liked to watch people come and go, he liked a bench by the woods, he liked to smell the grass after it was mowed.I follow him like, hate.I feel happy every minute and every second when the two of them are together.

When it was time to graduate, I became pregnant and was dismissed by the school.I didn't dare to go home, so I rented a small house outside the school, and I relied on his part-time job for food, clothing and housing. At that time, I really felt how lucky I was.After graduation, he said he would come to my parents to propose and apologize.He knelt in front of them, and they didn't beat or scold, and didn't even bother to look at him.I've ruined their reputation and become a disgrace to the family and their talking point. They hate us so much.I don't care at all.I think it is enough to have a man who loves me to be with me for the rest of my life.They said they were going to put Shaolin in prison, and we escaped.Call them and say that you have never given birth to such an unfilial daughter like me.

The path is chosen by oneself, and if one feels nothing wrong, naturally one will not repent.At that time, I really felt that nothing mattered, as long as he was there.It's worth it for love.Here we are, and he's got a really good job, and he's got plenty and ease.I'm happy to be a stay-at-home wife.But he wasn't that happy, obviously not as happy as I was.Every day I was so preoccupied that I asked him what was wrong, but he didn't tell me.I panicked for the first time.

An Ning was born, and he was overwhelmed with excitement.Seeing such a crumpled little thing for the first time, his eyes were full of tears, and he asked me "how to hold her, will I pinch her?" The original doubts were swept away.As first-time parents, we were both a little hectic.

The little things in life are annoying.Yes, it does have a headache.At that time, we started to quarrel, and he finally said that the yard made him breathless.The house and the yard are spacious, but he doesn't know where he can't breathe.An Yan was also born within two years, his face softened for a while as usual, and then gloomy again.For unknown reasons, we quarreled more and more frequently because of various things.He began to be more reluctant to go home.At that time, an idea popped into my head for the first time. Why did I decide to live my whole life? How can I make a lifelong decision so hastily? Time to give up your studies isn't worth it.What he was doing made me more and more suspicious.

Every day he is suffering, not living.I was angry seeing him like that, but I loved him, and I couldn't be open-minded enough to let him go.He is clumsy, he does not like to socialize, and he is not worldly. How can he live alone?Stay, it doesn't matter if you don't like me, he still has children.He is my child's father, and a lot of the time he is like my child.I can't let him suffer.We saved some money, and part of it I brought with me when I left home, and we pooled our money together to buy this orchard.Yes, I just want to tie him up with the things I like about him, as long as he doesn't leave me, anything is fine.I don't want him to be prominent, high and powerful, I am not Lady Macbeth, I just hope he can guard me and my child in peace.

Living together for many years, many times I forget how I fell in love in the first place.Recalling the past bit by bit, I began to regret my willfulness and recklessness back then.Inadvertently, I realized one thing, he didn't love me at all, didn't understand me, and didn't want to try to understand me.He married me entirely out of responsibility and guilt.I don't need pity and sympathy.I love him without hesitation, so just expecting equal love is not a responsibility.Hehe, after a little longer, I feel that I have been deceived, deceived by love, and deceived by myself.All the gleaming charm that had been seen on him before turned out to be faults.But I don't want to let him go. After so many years, it's just a scam, wouldn't it be fine? Besides, I lost my family because of him, and there is no way to turn back.

So, one wrong step and one wrong step.If you can't change it, you have to grit your teeth and hold on.For so many years, I resisted not contacting my family, and not asking for forgiveness and acceptance was also an anger. I was even afraid that my parents would say, "Look, I told you a long time ago! It's my own fault."

After he left, I had to hold on even more.Since I was a child, I have never suffered a little bitterness, and then I slowly tasted all kinds of sadness.So the old saying makes sense, living in this world, you can't escape the hardships you should have suffered, and you can't take away the sweetness you should taste.Alas, fortunately there are two of you, you see, now that you have grown up and looked good, I have survived too.The past doesn’t count, and it’s all turned over from today! Oops, I’m going to see the dumplings in the pot. "Du Yun looked at An Ning vigorously for a while, and saw that she lowered her head, clenched her fists, left the dining table and entered the kitchen. The dumplings should be placed in a circle, which symbolizes a happy reunion. But reunion is only when there are people, and only when there is a heart is good.

There was sobbing in the kitchen, but An Ning and An Yan pretended not to hear it.Du Yun's self-esteem is very strong, and he is also strong.In An Ning's impression, she had never cried.Whatever happened, she endured it, and she also endured it.Probably after being strong for so many years, he finally had to break out.