I lost my memory after throwing the ball and running over the total crematorium

Chapter 40



Chapter 40

After ten o'clock in the morning, He Jingnian washed GaoGao's little face, and together with Yuan Cisheng, he braided a very complicated little princess hairstyle for GaoGao.Just when the two were holding their daughter's hand and preparing to go to the living room for Brunch together, He Jingnian saw Shen Tangfeng sitting on the sofa by surprise.

Shen Tangfeng stared at him for a long time with his eyes that were bloodshot after not sleeping all night.After a while, I smiled and called him, "Niannian."

He Jingnian couldn't say a word.I was forced to be brought here by the original speech, so what about the others?How about a couple living in harmony with the original speech performance?How about playing a warm and happy game of house wine around the dinner table?

Also, he lowered his eyes, the well-chosen engagement suit on his body has long been changed, replaced by a fluffy cartoon sweater.There is a pink rabbit printed on the chest, GaoGao's favorite animal, warm and cute, full of childishness.

This is a complete set of parent-child outfits, Yuan Cisheng and Gao Gao are also wearing the same style.The three of them stood together like a close family.

"Tang Feng..." He Jingnian's ears were burning, and he felt ashamed.He felt that he had done nothing wrong, yet everything was terribly wrong.

"Niannian, don't worry, I've already explained it to him." He Jingnian pressed He Jingnian at the dining table in the original voice, "GaoGao misses you, so I'll bring you here to live with the child for a few days, how normal Everyone can understand it."

"Cake," he said to his daughter with a smile, "I'll also give you a teacup for Uncle Shen, and give him a scone to taste."

GaoGao obediently put a cup in front of Shen Tangfeng, and asked him, "Uncle Shen, do you want cream or jam?"

"Thank you, cake, everything is fine." Shen Tangfeng picked up the teacup, which was an ordinary white porcelain cup, which was different from He Jingnian's.

He Jingnian's cup is Royal Stafford overglaze bone china, with a farmhouse scene and a beautiful little brown rabbit painted on it.

The original voice is from Papa Rabbit with a pipe, and the voice of Cake is from Baby Bunny who weaves garlands.

Shen Tangfeng looked away, and the ordinary teacup in his hand somehow reminded him of the scene when he was just brought home by Shen Peng when he was a child.

The luxurious mansion, the colorful garden, the bright room, everything is as beautiful as a dream, and it is like a different world from the dark and cramped home he lived in before.

Shen Peng led him to the dining table, which was filled with delicacies that he had never seen before, exuding a tempting aroma.

A woman sat there, staring blankly somewhere between the TV and the sofa.Every once in a while, she would let out a loud, heavy sigh from deep in her chest, which sounded more like a drawn-out cry.

There are three people, four sets of tableware are placed on the table, only his set is different.

He reached out and touched the set of cutlery on the empty seat curiously.

Suddenly, the woman who had been sitting beside her without saying a word seemed to come back to her senses, her red and swollen eyes radiated fierce light, "What are you doing!"

"I... I'm sorry..." He was afraid and embarrassed, and forgot to retract his hand from the cup.

"Don't touch it!" The woman suddenly raised her voice, sharp and harsh as if she had dropped a handful of thumbtacks.She picked up the spoon in the steaming fish soup casserole and slammed it hard at him.

"Clap."

The soup spoon fell to the ground, splashing out a cloud of greasy, sticky on the mahogany floor, which looked like half-coagulated blood against the backlight.

After that, every meal is like this.Three people, four seats, three sets of the same tableware and one set of different tableware.

Zhuang Manyin always looked sluggish before eating, and Shen Peng reminded him again and again, "Eat quickly, I won't be able to bear it if I don't eat more."

"Oh." Zhuang Manyin responded, and said naturally, "I'll eat together when Xiao Yu comes back."

At this time, Shen Peng would always lower his head and slowly eat the cold food on his plate.

Later, once, Shen Peng couldn't help but say a few more words.He said: "How many years, is it useful for you to wait like this? You can wait like this to..."

Before finishing speaking, Zhuang Manyin was like an irritated female leopard, grabbed Shen Peng by the collar, and slapped him hard.

"Why... didn't you bring Xiao Yu back...?"

"Why... brought such a redundant person back?"

She turned her head, and her eyes were like poisoned steel needles, stabbing at him extremely coldly.

"You are not my child at all!"

"You don't belong in this family at all!"

"Get out, get out now! You will never want to take Xiao Yu's place! Never even think about it!"

Some pain sensations come from actual injuries.

For example, after being hit on the forehead by a spoon full of boiling soup, there was a continuous and clear pain sensation throughout the day.

And some pain sensations come from places that cannot be distinguished.It just seemed to be tentative in the depths of the heart, and vaguely passed into the brain.

For example, that set of tableware, which could never be unified, continued to produce endless pain in his body during many days and nights in his youth.

Like a perpetual motion machine riveted in the body, the pain has no root and never ends.

On the dining table in front of him, the pale teacup overlapped with the indescribable pain in his memory.The things that had been exhausted and finally forgotten, were finally ignited again.

"Are you happy?" Shen Tangfeng smiled, looking deeply at He Jingnian with dark eyes. "Are you happy here? If I don't come to you, you'll stay here forever, right?"

"Of course." Yuan Ci put down the teacup, with an elegant manner, but there was a slight sound on the cup and plate. "Niannian likes to be with GaoGao very much. GaoGao is his daughter who was born in October of her pregnancy. How can outsiders compare with the blood-related father and daughter."

Shen Tangfeng didn't seem to hear anything, just watched He Jingnian quietly, and said: "Niannian, I said, I understand your desire to make up for GaoGao, and I am willing to care for GaoGao with you. However, the more I am now Doubting more and more, do you really, just care about cakes?"

He Jingnian's eyelashes trembled, "What do you mean?"

"It means literally." Shen Tangfeng's smile remained the same, "Niannian, can you assure me that when you are here, the only person you think of is really the only one?"

He Jingnian's Adam's apple rolled, and just as he was about to say the three words "I can", Yuan Cisheng's sight suddenly came into his corner of the eye.As if being pulled by a small magnetic hook, he turned his head involuntarily.

It froze for a moment.

Quickly stay away again.

It was so dangerous that it almost fell into the deep green lake.

It's a pity that this brief absence cannot escape Shen Tangfeng's eyes.

"I see." He stood up, "I wish you a happy day, and I won't bother you."

"Tang Feng!" He Jingnian hurried to chase him.When Shen Tangfeng turned around, the moment of disappointment stung his heart, he had never seen Shen Tangfeng showing such a gloomy expression.

However, in the next second, someone held his arm tightly, and the voice of Yuan Ci refused to let him go.

"Don't go." Yuan Ci's voice was extremely low, "Can you just stay here? That's it, stay with me and Cake, okay?"

There was a soft heat from the fingers, and Gao Gao's little hands clenched his knuckles tightly.The little girl didn't know what happened, she only knew that he might leave again, so she used a little stubbornness to prevent him from leaving.

He Jingnian closed his eyes, as if the heart was caught, and the heartbeat became painful and slow.He was reluctant to part with his daughter and wanted to hold his little girl all the time.However, reason told him that he had to go after Shen Tangfeng, not only because Shen Tangfeng was hurt by him, but also because...

"Every year."

The voice of the original speech poured into my ears again, it was a turbulent rustle, disturbing the emotions that should be orderly.

"Niannian, you and I both need you."

"Niannian, I really want to give Gaogui a complete home."

"Niannian, please, don't leave..."

"I'm sorry." He Jingnian lowered his head, and gently but firmly broke away from him. "I can't stay here, I have to find Tang Feng."

Yuanci's voice froze, and a huge sense of powerlessness hit him head-on.Such a small movement easily knocked him down in the blink of an eye.

He didn't know what reason he could use to keep He Jingnian.He knew very well that he had no weight in He Jingnian's heart, no matter in the past or now.

In the past, He Jingnian loved the young master persistently; now, he insists on being with Shen Tangfeng.Although he has always been there, he will always be the choice to be eliminated.

He really had no other way, he was at the end of his rope, he was at the end of his rope, and even tried to save him with his child.

But he didn't expect that even if he had He Jingnian's flesh and blood, so what, he couldn't keep He Jingnian's people, let alone his heart, in the end the only one left in place was himself.

Yuan Cisheng slightly raised his head, the room was sunny, but he felt that the world was suddenly dark.

It was too dark to see the sun.

But obviously, he was never afraid of the dark.He was imprisoned by Yuan Zhengye for so long and endured countless dark days alone, but he never gave in and begged for mercy.But now, just the shadow of He Jingnian turning his back on him completely took away all the light in his eyes.

He Jingnian finally caught up with Shen Tangfeng.

Shen Tangfeng was not as angry or angry as he had guessed, and that clear and refined face was still as gentle and quiet as ever, not even a trace of displeasure could be seen.

But He Jingnian's mood became more and more sad. He would rather Shen Tangfeng blame him, even if it was just to vent his dissatisfaction.But Shen Tangfeng not only did not, but also said: "Niannian, I lost my composure in front of me, I shouldn't talk to you like that."

When He Jingnian heard it, his eyes burned and his nose was sore.Time and time again, Shen Tangfeng gave him almost bottomless tenderness and tolerance, but his heart was not as unshakable as promised at the beginning.

He was wrong and ashamed.This sense of guilt and guilt continued to swell in his heart, which made him have an impulse, if only he could marry Shen Tangfeng right away.

Get married, have a real home, and build impenetrable barriers.In this case, no matter how strong the wind blows, it is impossible to shake him a bit.

The next day, Shen Tangfeng flew to the neighboring city early in the morning to deal with the delayed business, and he didn't even send him any news before leaving.In the past, no matter how busy Shen Tangfeng was, he would definitely find time to have a meal with him before leaving.

He Jingnian knew that he had finally broken Shen Tangfeng's heart.After the two returned to the apartment without a word that night, he reached out to turn on the light, but Shen Tangfeng held his hand down.In the dark and cold entrance, only the voice was exceptionally clear.Shen Tangfeng said to himself: "Niannian, do you still remember what was the first sentence you said to me in the hospital?"

"I... can't remember."

"When you were the most ill, you didn't say a word for a whole month. At that time, even the doctor almost gave up. However, you took the initiative to speak to me for the first time. It's like a miracle."

"I said... what?"

"Tell me, Tang Feng, don't go."

He Jingnian's pupils trembled slightly, and a sunny afternoon appeared in front of his eyes.On that day, his broken mind finally gathered slowly, the demons that had been haunting and restraining him disappeared, and a fair and handsome young face was frozen in the gradually clear vision.

He knows who he is.

Shen Tangfeng, the person who has always been by his side, the person who has been protecting and taking care of himself.

Even if his thinking is chaotic and his consciousness is fuzzy, he is like a beam of light that can penetrate the fog, bright and firm enough to drive away the darkness for him.

"Tang Feng... Don't go..." He stretched out his hand, and held his sleeve tightly like a lost child.

Shocked by the wind, Shen Tang bent down and gently but forcefully pulled him into his arms.

Incredibly warm.

"Year after year, it would be great if the time could stay in the year before returning to China." Shen Tangfeng said slowly, "Once you come back, everything will change."

Yes, He Jingnian thought.At that time, although he didn't have the past, he lived a relaxed and clean life, and he could have a simple and happy dream like ordinary people.

Throughout the night, the lights in the apartment were not on, and the darkness was more suitable for them.It's dark enough that you can't see the expression on the other person's face.Only by being completely black can you completely deceive your own heart.

During Shen Tangfeng's absence, He Jingnian went to the mall for two days in a row, bought a lot of daily necessities, all in pairs, and replaced all those in the apartment.

Although he and Shen Tangfeng lived together, they kept the habit they had in New York. The two of them would not participate too much in each other's lives, and were more like two independent residents under the same roof.

Now that they're both engaged, it's only natural that they're getting closer and more like a couple in love, right?

He Jingnian spent another whole day to renovate the apartment. A complete set of brand-new supplies is placed in the room, which is a bit sweet like a newlywed.

After he had cleaned everything up completely, his sense of uneasiness eased a lot, as if with his efforts, everything was headed towards the right track again.

At dusk, the apartment buildings began to light up lights of various colors gradually, floating out of the night like fish swimming in the deep sea.

He Jingnian waited with his ears pricked up, and when he heard the doorbell, he hurried over to open the door.Outside, stood the dusty Shen Tangfeng, the camel-colored cashmere coat was covered with the cool air of the late autumn night, He Jingnian held his hands, it was really cold.

So, He Jingnian covered it a little tighter, and used his palms to warm his skin which had been blown cold by the wind.

Shen Tangfeng lowered his head, saw his soft black hair and some white curls, and smiled with his lips curled up. "Niannian, I'm not here for a few days, do you miss me?"

He Jingnian nodded, relieved in a breath, and felt that this was so good, he and Shen Tangfeng finally returned to the normal state of lovers.

Pulling Shen Tangfeng into the room, He Jingnian enthusiastically took him to see the brand new couple items.

"Look, even the slippers are a pair." He Jingnian smiled shyly. "Will it be a little too cute? But I've been picking for a long time, and it seems that they all look like this... Tang Feng?"

Shen Tangfeng lowered his head and did not speak, his long and narrow eye sockets were covered with dark shadows.He Jingnian called him several times, and then he raised his head as if he had just woken up from a dream, his eyes were red, and under the warm light, there was a wet, wet, wet light.

"What's wrong with you?" He Jingnian asked worriedly, "Did something happen to you?"

Shen Tangfeng shook his head, leaned forward, and hugged him with open arms.He Jingnian lost his balance and fell backwards, just like that he was pushed into the soft sofa.

For the first time, Shen Tangfeng exerted so much force on him that it hurt him, as if he wanted to rub him into his chest.

He Jingnian's heart beat a little faster, for some reason, but at this moment, he suddenly remembered the original speech.It's definitely not because he misses him, he doesn't even want to see him, it's probably... no, it can only be because the warmth of hugs is always the same, and that's why there are reflections that shouldn't be projected in his mind.

He Jingnian raised his hand, trying to hug Shen Tangfeng back, but his hand was grabbed.Shen Tangfeng held his hand and pressed it against his cheek.His outline seemed to be carved deeper by the late autumn wind, and a layer of wind and sand floated in his black jade-like pupils, which made his chest ache.

His Adam's apple rolled, and he said to He Jingnian in a magnetic and gentle voice: "Niannian, I love you."

He Jingnian was taken aback.Shen Tangfeng is not like the original voice, he will repeat this almost heavy confession repeatedly.In my impression, he seemed to have never said this to himself.

"Before you, I had many people. They loved me, so I don't mind them staying by my side." Shen Tangfeng looked at him deeply, "But, it won't be long before I get bored. I Knowing that no matter how much they love me, I can't feel any love for them."

"Year after year, only you are different, you are different from them."

He Jingnian had heard about Shen Tangfeng's past love affairs, and it is said that none of the people who fell in love with him ended well.However, that kind of Shen Tangfeng was very different from the Shen Tangfeng he knew, no matter how exaggerated the rumors were, he didn't care at all.

It's just...why did Shen Tangfeng choose him?

He Jingnian closed his eyes and stopped thinking about it.I was so surprised that after hearing such an earnest confession, I didn't give my fiancé the same affectionate response.His heart was beating restlessly, eager to say something, preferably something appropriate to the situation.

At this time, Shen Tangfeng sat down on the sofa, stretched his slender and straight legs, pulled him over and hugged him from behind, put his head on his shoulder, and rubbed his neck with his face.

"You are my first love, the person I fell in love with for the first time." Shen Tangfeng said in a tender voice, "Niannian, when I came back tonight, I was thinking, you are my home, you gave me a home."

He Jingnian felt his cheek in embarrassment, it was very hot.The air is filled with the breath of Shen Tangfeng, the warm and pleasant smell he has been familiar with for several years, like a mountain stream shining under the sun.

Shen Tangfeng pinched his jaw, turned his face slightly, and leaned forward to kiss him.He Jingnian held his breath, ready to accept the kiss.

He and Shen Tangfeng hadn't really kissed before, and he wanted to take it seriously.

However, at the next moment, Yuan Cisheng's eyes flashed in his mind.He even saw Yuan Cisheng's figure flashing away in a corner of the night outside the window in his hallucination, and his entire back stiffened.

Shen Tangfeng must have noticed it, that's why, the moment his lips were about to touch, he only planted a gentle and restrained kiss on his forehead.

"Niannian, do you love me too?"

He Jingnian moved his lips, and before he could answer, Shen Tang's clear voice rang out in his ears, "It doesn't matter if you don't answer, I know it in my heart."

He Jingnian's slightly tightened fingertips finally relaxed.

"By the way, this is for you." Shen Tangfeng seemed to only remember now, and took out an exquisite kraft paper envelope from his pocket, and put it in his hand.

"Eh?" He Jingnian didn't realize it, "Where did you get the letter from?"

"The assistant in your studio handed it over to me." Shen Tangfeng stared at him, "It seems to be a letter sent to you by Yuan Cisheng, do you want to open it and have a look?"

He Jingnian didn't know why Yuan Cisheng wrote to him, maybe it was because he didn't answer his phone all the time.He pinched the envelope, it was quite thin, like stiff cardboard.

"Do you want me to open it for you?" Shen Tangfeng stretched out his hand, trying to help him tear off the seal of the envelope.

"Forget it, I don't want to hear anything about him anymore." He Jingnian took it away in time and put it aside.

No matter what the original speech sent to him, no matter how important it was, he didn't want to read it.

Can't watch either.

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The author has something to say:

The next chapter has my favorite spa prey

感谢在2022-05-0700:00:00~2022-05-0800:00:00期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angel of the irrigation nutrient solution: if you don’t enter c9, don’t change the name to 1 bottle;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!


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