1000 meters in diameter

Chapter 15 Don't You Care About Me Anymore?

Linjiang Linjiang is naturally by the river.

An Ning was born and raised here, and only left when he went abroad.After the plane landed, he opened his bleary red and swollen eyes, and turned his head to look out the window.

It was cold outside and there was a mist on the windows.Unlike City Z, Linjiang is not dry all year round, winter is always wet and cold, and the indoor temperature is lower than that outside.

The cabin radio began to broadcast the temperature outside the cabin, and the passengers were eager to move, some took off their seat belts and turned on their mobile phones.

Everyone's heart is like an arrow, and so is An Ning.

But he is also torn.His person has landed, but his heart is still wandering in the sky, as if he has some regrets and was left at the airport where he took off.After only two hours, I began to miss Awen's voice, which seemed to be the only intersection between him and City Z left.

Finally turned on the phone, a lot of new messages.

The well-connected colleagues heard about him from the department manager, and they were very careful about what they said, lest they hurt his already extremely fragile nerves.Everyone understands that people are born mortal, but mothers are mothers after all, and mothers are different from other people.The roommate who shared the rent also sent a message, asking if it was possible to requisition the microwave oven and beanbag sofa he had left behind, and he replied, "It's all fine."

There is also a text message from my father, asking him if he has landed, and telling him to take a taxi home instead of squeezing the subway.

Nothing but that.

That number was saved peacefully, and it was "Han Yan", but I still called him Awen in my heart.You can find your own WeChat by searching your mobile phone number, but there are no new friend applications.

An Ning was not disappointed, but a little sad, very restrained.

The next step is to get off the plane, pick up the luggage, go home, and go to the hospital.He spent two weeks like a war.

My mother's lung adenocarcinoma was discovered not too late, but unfortunately, lymph node metastasis has already occurred. Surgery is required first, and then chemotherapy and targeted therapy are performed depending on the situation.Dad was also getting old, and he had been terrified for a long time before his son came home, and now he finally took a rest.

In the past half a month, An Ning hardly had a day off. He ran all over the big hospitals in the city and the surrounding areas, queuing up all night for registration, getting up early for medical checkups, arranging three meals for his parents, asking someone to find a relationship to ask about beds, and finally settled in. Once you get into the right hospital, you have to worry about scheduling the surgery.

He is so busy that he has no time to think about the future, and of course he has no time to think about feelings.Occasionally, while waiting for his mother to have an examination, he would sit on a blue plastic chair in the corridor of the hospital and pull out his mobile phone to check the cases related to his mother's disease.Seeing others write about how the postoperative is getting better and how the recovery is going smoothly, he will breathe a sigh of relief and feel a lot of hope in his heart. Seeing other people writing about postoperative recurrence and targeted drug failure, he will be at a loss again, with cold hands and feet .

Very occasionally, he thought of Han Yan.

This kind of miss usually happens when you brush Moments.He is not Han Yan's WeChat friend, but Qiao Yu hasn't deleted him yet, so he can still see Qiao Yu's updates.Qiao Yu drove a sports car into the mountains today, wore a limited edition jacket tomorrow, and celebrated a friend's birthday at a bar the day after tomorrow.Whenever he uploaded a photo, An Ning would bring the screen closer, zoom in on the photo, and look for that fierce face inside.

It's a pity that things backfired, and Han Yan never appeared in the photo.Han Yan seemed to have evaporated from the peaceful world.There are no new developments, no new stories, and everything is stagnant in late autumn.

Yeah.

At first, An Ning would pull out their voice chat and listen to it repeatedly, but later she got angry with herself and stopped listening to it.He guessed that Han Yan didn't think about him, after he left.With that person's personality, it's probably impossible to drag things along and forget about it.

An Ning knew that Han Yan was right, but she stubbornly asked herself not to think about him anymore.

When the date of the operation was fixed, my mother had already lived in the hospital for a full week, and my father almost never left during the day.Father An used to be a serious department-level cadre, but he loved his wife very much, and was known as the Gu family.The family of three couldn't go home on Halloween, so my father made three dishes and one soup and brought them to the hospital. They set up a small table and ate while watching TV.

The hospital lacks everything except ghosts, and everyone keeps silent about the word ghost festival.But when An Ning was still abroad, this festival was very grand. Children would knock on the door to ask for candy, and adults could also ask neighbors for candy.

It was dark after dinner.My mother was in a bad mood, and she looked at the TV and tilted her head to one side again.Dad was playing electronic Go with reading glasses, his voice turned to the lowest level, and his expression was very focused.An Ning sat by the hospital bed for a while, got up and walked to the window, and found a person in a striped suit playing the accordion opposite.

On the top of the dimly lit building, someone was playing the piano, someone was listening, and someone was applauding.

He couldn't hear the music, but he was still soothed by the music.Looking at it, he felt bitter in his mouth. After a long time, he took out his mobile phone to take a picture of this scene in the distance, and sent it to Moments.

"I want candy."

He matched this sentence.

Afterwards, I put away my mobile phone and went to the end of the corridor to fetch water with the kettle.There are many people in winter, so I waited in line for a while, and when I went back, my father just got up and stretched his waist.

"Dad, you go back first." He put down the kettle, "Come and replace me tomorrow."

There is no need for nurses before the operation, and now the two of them always take turns on duty.

The two put away the finished lunch boxes one by one, and his father asked, "What would Ning Ning want for breakfast tomorrow morning, how about egg pancakes with purple rice porridge."

He nodded, "Pour some sugar into the porridge."

Dad laughed that he was still a child at heart, and he had to put sugar in his porridge.

Originally this was a double ward, but the aunt in the next bed had surgery the day after tomorrow and was taken home by her family today, so tonight there are only mother An Ning and her son.

After her father left, An Ning turned off the lights, closed the doors and windows, and left only the TV for the evening news.

He likes to watch the news recently, because there are tragic stories from all over the world in the news.Sometimes when he sees something touching, he will deliberately go to the Internet to find ways to donate, and do his best.Compared with these people, their family is lucky, because his mother has medical insurance, and their family still has savings, enough to last until the fork in life.

After watching it for more than ten minutes, the phone suddenly vibrated, and the cold light from the screen made his face turn pale.

A message from my mother's attending doctor, Professor Hu: "Xiao Ning, are you still in the hospital?"

He was startled, and immediately replied: "Yes."

"Come to my office."

Is there something wrong with my mother's condition?

He was like a frightened bird.Walking to the door of the office, he took a deep breath before knocking on the door.

"Please come in."

A reliable angel in white was sitting at the table by the window.Professor Hu is an authority on adenocarcinoma. It is said that he has 20 years of treatment experience, but he looks very young, probably because he knows how to take care of it.At the beginning, An Ning relied on layers of relationships and tried many ways to finally transfer her mother to her. She thought that such an expert must be serious, but she didn't expect to meet her and found that she was quite amiable, even a little bit kind.

"Haven't you returned so late?"

"I won't go back today. Dad will come over tomorrow."

Professor Hu looked at him lovingly, and nodded appreciatively, "It's really rare to have a filial child like you. Come, come and sit."

There was an empty chair beside her, and a pile of medical records on the desk.

An Ning sat over, still a little apprehensive, and asked, "What do you want me to do?"

"It's nothing." Professor Hu looked at it for a moment, then smiled softly, "I just want to ask how your mother is doing, so don't worry too much about it."

An Ning answered truthfully: "My mother is very strong, and she would tell when she felt uncomfortable. A few days ago, Aunt Sun in the next ward left, and she cried twice after hearing that."

"This is human nature, and it's a good thing to vent. When the weather is good, you go out for a walk more, and the mood of the activists will be better."

He nodded obediently: "Okay."

After looking at him for a while, Professor Hu smiled slightly: "It's nice to call you Mom."

The topic was suddenly a little close, and a little sudden.An Ning muttered and didn't know how to answer, she just smiled shyly at her.

She turned her head to pick up the thermos cup on the table, blew on the tea leaves floating on it, and then raised the corners of her mouth implicitly: "If my son is willing to call me like you, then he really has nothing to ask for."

It looks like complaining, but in fact, maternal love is gentle.

An Ning was not sure what she meant, fearing that her child might be suffering from some kind of illness, and recklessly comforting her would be a bad thing.After much deliberation, he lightly rubbed his knees with his palms, and said hesitantly, "Is your son relatively silent?"

So I don't like to be called mother.

"Silence for what? You have a powerful mouth." Professor Hu lightly annoyed, his eyes fell on the medical records, "But I haven't seen him for several years, I don't know if this brat is still as muddy as before."

"He's not with you?"

"How can there be such a good fortune." She shook her head, "When he was very young, I left their father and son to go abroad for further studies, and he never understood me for this. Later, when I finished my studies and returned to China, his father had already returned to China. As for him, he didn’t want to live with his father, so he finished junior high school on the aid of poor students and lived in the school dormitory for three years. I wanted to take him over to live with him, but he refused without thinking. Let me pretend I never gave birth to him."

An Ning listened sympathetically.

She couldn't see her face, but she could feel her loneliness in her side eyes.After a while, she seemed to cheer up a lot, and said with a smile: "But I really didn't expect that this kid is good enough to grow up without relying on his parents, and he has a pretty good life."

The fact that her son didn't recognize her didn't affect her pride in him at all.

"Maybe... Maybe he will figure it out after a long time." An Ning said clumsily, "Just wait patiently, mom is a mom after all."

Professor Hu thoughtfully put down the thermos bottle gently: "I've figured it out and dare not ask extravagantly. As long as he can call me occasionally like he has recently, even if he asks me for help, I will be content."

An Ning sat silently without speaking.

In the next period of time, Professor Hu asked some basic information about him and gave him many instructions, which can be called caring.He was grateful in his heart and was willing to chat for a while, but he was worried that his mother would not be able to call anyone for something, so he got up and left.

"An Ning, wait a minute."

He paused.

"Extend your hand." Professor Hu smiled lightly.

He stretched out his hand as promised.

"Silly boy, palms up."

He did so immediately.

The right hand in the white coat stretched out, covered his palm, and dropped something.

It's a toffee.

"Like Halloween?" Professor Hu smiled, "You can't buy anything particularly good at night, so you can just eat a little."

There was only one, as if specially prepared for him.

An Ning had a sore nose, stared down at the warm brown candy wrapper, "Do you like Halloween too?"

"Probably." Professor Hu said calmly, "I don't care if my son likes it. I like whatever he likes."

There was another layer of meaning in the words, An Ning was too stupid to catch it.

Back in the ward, he carefully peeled off the candy wrapper, put it in his mouth and continued watching TV.The sweet taste permeated between the lips and teeth, and lingered for a long time.

He switched to the movie channel to watch light comedy, watched it and laughed, and soon lay on his side on the camp bed, dreaming about the sweetness of sugar.

Maybe candy really brings good luck. Three days later, Ann's mother had a successful operation, and chemotherapy and targeted therapy followed.

Although chemotherapy is painful, targeted drugs may develop drug resistance, and cancer cells may still develop brain metastases, it is difficult to pass the test. Every pass is a victory, and it is worth rewarding yourself.

The way An Ning rewards herself is to go home and rest for a day, with her father and the nurse watching over her mother.

He didn't do anything that day, he ordered takeaway at home, played games, and watched movies.At night, I received a text message from my father: everything is fine, sleep peacefully.

Worried about what might happen tomorrow, he couldn't bear to sleep, took a bath in the bathtub, and then lay down on the bed to play with his mobile phone.Unexpectedly, when it was almost midnight, there was a red dot in WeChat, and there was a new friend application.

The heart beat violently.

Before he opened it, he had an intuition: it was Awen.

With a trembling fingertip, he clicked on it, and the person's profile picture was a night scene by the river, with several boats moored by the river, and his WeChat name was ArvinHan.

The reason for the application is only two words: Han Yan.

The thing that I had been looking forward to for a long time suddenly came true, and it felt unreal.An Ning stared at the word "Accept" next to the name and was dazed.

He even pinched his forearm to make sure he wasn't dreaming.

Can candy's good fortune last this long?

Fearing that the good luck would disappear, he quickly clicked to accept.

"You have added ArvinHan, now you can chat."

Withdrawing his fingers like an electric shock, he took two deep breaths, and then clicked into Ah Wen's circle of friends like a thief, wanting to take a peek.

Fortunately, Han Yan showed himself openly in front of others, without setting any threshold or time limit.However, the circle of friends he posted is also very limited, from last year to now, there are only five.

October 10 last year: "Seven years are not easy, but it is worth commemorating." The accompanying picture is the email sent by the firm for the seventh anniversary of joining the company.

March 3 this year: "Share the article: Diagram SQL, the past and present of the relational operation language."

May 5: "I rang the bell yesterday, and I came to the hospital of traditional Chinese medicine today. My cervical spine said that it has made great contributions and deserves a physical therapy."

No wonder he always seems to have a backache...

June 6: "xxx revised its semi-annual performance forecast from 19-25% to 40%-35%. The new energy vehicle sector continues to be hot, and the horizontal comparison of Tesla's valuation is actually not Outrageous."

The network got stuck here, and An Ning thought it was gone, so she kept pulling down to refresh anxiously.

After half a minute, I finally saw the last one.

At the beginning of October, Han Yan's last circle of friends, there is no text, only pictures——

It's a smiley face on the window.

A curved mouth, two big dots for eyes.

that is not……

An Ning's heart stopped suddenly, she took a deep breath, and zoomed in on the photo.

No, not the one he drew on the taxi.Although the same is late at night, the same is a car window, and the same is a smiling face, but they were not drawn by him.

He was in a taxi at the time, and he drew the door on the right, but in the photo it is on the left.

You can even see the reflection of Han Yan holding his mobile phone on the car window.

It was taken by Han Yan.

The more he looked at An Ning, the more he felt that he recognized this car.It belongs to Han Yan, no mistake, he has been in it.A Subaru's window shape is very different from a taxi's.

What happened that day?

Why did Han Yan imitate the smiling face he drew and redraw one on his car.

An Ning sat up from the bed, looked at the photos again and again, opened and closed the memory drawer countless times, and finally remembered that he left with Qiao Yu that day, and Han Yan went downstairs to see him off.

That's right, that day, it was extremely cold outside, and Han Yan stood there for a long time.An Ning even remembered what Han Yan had said to him that day.

Han Yan said, "Don't I have a name?"

Han Yan said, "Let's go."

Is it possible that Han Yan actually thought about chasing him that night, and made it clear, is it possible that Han Yan had already chased him by car for a while, but finally gave up.

Thinking about it further, his heart ached, as if he had been hit by a dull hammer.

Is it possible that Han Yan's thinking is that it is enough for An Ning to be happy, and it is enough to receive a smiling face.