summer like smoke

Chapter 43

Ling Wang didn't expect to see Yanyan when he returned to his "home" this time, he never thought about it.Since they separated last year, he has not seen Yanyan for more than a year.During this period, he always came back to this so-called (at least he thought) "home" regularly. At first, he expected to see Yanyan appearing in front of him as soon as he opened the door. He played games that he would never lose in front of the computer, but the more times he played, the more he was disappointed, so he gradually stopped looking forward to it.

However, surprises are always unexpected.

On a hot June afternoon, Ling Wang postponed his business as usual and drove back home.It was his habit to go to Yanyan's bedroom as soon as he entered the house.So at the moment when he opened the door and entered within sight, Ling Wang's eyes blurred and his breath suffocated, as if he saw an angel who had fallen into the world.The anticipation scene that had been imagined and sketched [-] times in his mind suddenly came to him at this moment without warning, and his eyes widened in disbelief.

The air conditioner was not too low in the room, and it was very cool and comfortable.Lin Yan casually put on a thin blanket with her upper body bare, revealing her smooth white shoulders and slender straight legs restlessly.The posture is his usual "fetal" posture, with his knees bent, his hands clasped, his slender eyelashes drooping obediently, his messy black hair obedient, and his smooth chest rising and falling—that scene is really impressive. It was both heart-wrenching and distressing.

Unsurprisingly heartbroken, but distressed for no reason.

Ling Wang didn't know if it was because he hadn't seen Yanyan for so long that he had an illusion. Although Yanyan had always been fair-skinned and thin-boned, for some reason Ling Wang had such an astonishingly keen, almost prophetic intuition: Yan, compared to every time he had ever seen, any time, was much haggard, pale, and fragile.

It seems that it will break if you squeeze it lightly, it will break if you blow it lightly, or it will fall over if you touch it lightly.What's more, there is no need to do anything at all, the pitiful sunlight that seeps in from the thick curtains on the side blurs and covers Lin Yan's beautiful and amazing back, making him look as if he will melt away in the next second, and return to what he should have been. Belong to heaven.

This unlucky thought shocked Ling Wang into a cold sweat in the scorching hot summer.He shook his head, closed his eyes and rubbed his temples, smiled helplessly, then carefully closed the door and exited the room gently.It's not that Ling Wang doesn't want to go in and get closer to have a closer look at his Yanyan, cover Yanyan with a quilt, etc. In fact, Ling Wang really wants to do these gentle and intimate little actions; Indeed, I tried it myself a long, long time ago, but the result outweighed the gain and self-defeating, so that I couldn't die, and woke up Yan Yan, who was trying to please him.Hypoglycemia and bad temper... The past is unbearable, and the smoke and smoke are on fire, it's not just for fun.Ling Wang had a deep understanding and was almost tortured to death.

And it was precisely because of this incident that Ling Wang realized that Yanyan's sleep was very shallow.In fact, Lin Yan was indeed right—at least, before he fell ill.

Ling Wang didn't know that according to Lin Yan's current physical condition, even if he just had the guts to bend in and steal a kiss from Lin Yan just now, Lin Yan would probably have a hard time waking up...nor would he be able to wake up.

But in just half a year, he has become so weak.

It was nothing more than coming back to get something. Lin Yan originally planned to take it and leave. He never thought about how long he would stay in this house, let alone take a nap; The scorching sun and the heat wave hit his face, his eyes were dark, his feet suddenly staggered, the feeling of exhaustion and dizziness rushed to him at the same time, he held on to the edge of the door for tens of seconds, his knuckles were all bruised The bulge turned white, but it still couldn't hold on. He gritted his teeth unbearably, and finally had to go back to the house to rest, at least until the sun went down.

A body that tires so easily no longer feels like his own.He hated such weakness, and was even more afraid of being involuntary.

After waiting and waiting, Lin Yan just tilted his head on the bed and fell asleep in a daze.This action is quite similar to the state of those dying and reluctant people that are often staged in TV dramas.

Maybe, maybe one day, he just fell asleep in such a daze, and then never woke up again.

Ling Wang asked someone to deliver dinner, and the table was full of Lin Yan's favorite dishes, with heavy flavors and strong stamina, Lin Yan's favorite.Lin Yan woke up just after six o'clock—was awakened by hunger, but also by the fragrance.He wasn't too surprised to see Ling Wang. Before he fell asleep, he had already expected this kind of scene when he woke up; he even sat down in a friendly manner, ready to give Ling Wang a face, and then leave after dinner.

Lin Yan has never been someone who treats himself badly, let alone now that things are going from bad to worse.

Ling Wang couldn't hide his surprise and sat next to Lin Yan. He even forgot to take his chopsticks. He just stared at Lin Yan's side face obsessively. The unusually long-lasting paleness worried him, and he held it in for a long time. I couldn't help but say: "Yanyan, didn't the contract with Xia Zhaoshi end at the end of last year? Where have you been for the past six months? Why did you make yourself so haggard?"

Lin Yantou didn't raise his expression, he still chewed slowly and carefully, and waited until all the food in his mouth was swallowed, then slowly and lightly threw out three words :"none of your business."

"..."

Ling Wang was used to being choked like this, and he didn't mind a long time ago.For his cigarettes, he never had a temper.If you say he's soft, let's be soft, it doesn't matter, anyway, he just can't lose his temper when facing his smoke.

"Okay, okay, it's none of my business," Ling Wang said smilingly, with a sincere and gentle voice, "I just hope...just hope that you can take good care of yourself. Or stay with you The person next to you can take good care of you."

Saying these words at this time, it would make Lin Yan feel desolate now.But no matter how desolate it was, it was only his desolation, which had nothing to do with Ling Wang, and never had anything to do with it.So Lin Yan sneered, and replied unceremoniously: "Oh, don't worry, that person is not you anyway──" After a pause, his voice swirled and deepened, like revenge and venting, and the aftertaste lingered endlessly , like the same benevolent, hoarse and mournful cemetery lament, "It will never be you."

Ling Wang had already guessed that Lin Yan would answer him this way. Although it was not the original sentence, the meaning was similar.Injury is inevitable, no matter how many times you listen to it, you can't escape, but once you listen to it a lot, you will gradually get used to it, and it's nothing.Time numbs, not forgets, disappointment.

Sometimes Ling Wang himself felt that he was pathetic and not like a man; but occasionally, when he thought about it, he could still see Yanyan, and even be able to sit beside Yanyan and share with him like this now. After dinner... Every time at this time, he would feel that, in fact, all of this is nothing, and it is very worthwhile.He should stop greedily expecting more.

Self-esteem is nothing, if there is a person in your life, it is really impossible not to love, you must love.

Sighing, Ling Wang was silent for a while, suddenly his expression changed, and his brows gradually smiled: "Oh, Yanyan, let me tell you a happy event, I don't know if you know it, Yingying, she is going to be a mother."

Lin Yan was really stunned by this news, and after digesting it for a long time, he said in a daze, "Oh...then, congratulations to her."

Hearing this kind of news when he was about to die, in fact, what Lin Yan really wanted to say in his heart was not just a simple, understatement of congratulations.Maybe he said it simply, but he was heartbroken.Although there is life, there is death. This world has followed such a well-known, fair and ruthless natural law and operation method for hundreds of millions of years, but once you put it on yourself, you will live as someone else and die as yourself. , no one will be happy.

Even if it is a relative.Even that is next of kin.

New life is born, born continuously, the world is updated, and the speed of change is so fast, faster and faster, and the face, whether it is evolving or plastic surgery, is undoubtedly becoming more and more beautiful, striving for perfection... If When one day, someone more beautiful than him, or even much more beautiful, appears in this world, will anyone remember him, Lin Yan?Then, who else would still remember him, Lin Yan.Even if he, Lin Yan, once shone so brilliantly, but the meteor fell and the brilliance was extinguished immediately, whose memory can last forever for him, and it will be clear for a lifetime.

He may not be afraid of death, unless he is sure that after his death, he can still live in a person, in the memory of a lifetime, which will never be erased and never forgotten.

He is very greedy, that's how greedy, he doesn't hide it and is not ashamed, not for anything else, just because he was so gorgeous.

All he wanted was a tomb that would allow him to rest in peace.

Ling Wang tentatively suggested: "Don't you go and congratulate her in person? Yingying called me a while ago to ask if I have heard from you." He was a little curious, "But speaking of it... Are the two familiar? Why don't I know?"

"...Fortunately, we often play games online, and she is the only one in this world who allows me to really play games," Lin Yan withdrew his thoughts, and explained in a casual manner, "And a few months ago , I did her a little favor."

Ling Wang suddenly realized: "Oh, so that's the case. No wonder she asked me to tell her as soon as I found you. When the child is born, I want to recognize you as a godfather."

When Lin Yan heard this, he couldn't help laughing for a moment, and a very shallow self-deprecating smile slowly overflowed from the corner of his mouth.When the child is born... Heh, I don't know if he will survive on that day.

Lin Yan didn't answer, and Ling Wang didn't feel embarrassed. He hesitated for a few times, and suddenly closed his eyes tightly as if he had made up his mind, moved his lips, and said in a low voice: "Actually, there is no need to bother to recognize anything." Godfather. After all, Yanyan, you are the child's real uncle, aren't you? "

The right hand that had just been raised to pick up vegetables suddenly froze in the air, Lin Yan's expression froze and he forgot to move.Ling Wang thoughtfully put the piece of pork belly he wanted into the bowl, Lin Yan looked down, raised his brows coldly, and in the next second he lifted the bowl expressionlessly, and the rice was filled with meat in an instant. , all of it was sprinkled on Ling Wang's expensive shirt, which was shiny.

"You know?" He narrowed his eyes and asked calmly.

Looking down, he lost another shirt...Ling Wang couldn't get angry and could only smile wryly: "You know what."

"What else do you know?" Lin Yan twitched the corners of his mouth and gave a lazy smirk, "Don't you just know how cheap your mother is?"

Ling Wang let out a long sigh, lowered his eyes and lowered his eyebrows, a little humbled: "I know, Yanyan, I know, my mother did too much to your parents, but now she has passed away after all, and the final outcome, It can be regarded as what she deserves, and the retribution has been fulfilled. I don't ask you to respect her, but at least, for the deceased, let's have a little bit of virtue."

The word "koude" made Lin Yan really want to laugh up to the sky.Ha ha ha, mouth, mouth... hell... go to hell!How many years of Yin virtue he has accumulated through hard work!But it's not about to die now... It's not about to die!

Lin Yan bent over and covered his stomach, and smiled so that the corners of his eyes faintly glistened with tears, the crazy desire for revenge flooded him, drowning him, and knocked him out: "Ling Wang, do you really think that Did your mother commit suicide? Do you really think she turned on the gas on her own initiative and wanted to die with my father!? Haha! Pooh! That bitch of your mother doesn’t have the courage! My father killed me! It’s my dad who has been taking revenge on her! Did you know that!? Did you hear me clearly!?”

Compared with Lin Yan's uncontrollable excitement at the moment, Ling Wang looked very calm from the beginning to the end, and even faintly revealed a trace of sympathy and compassion in the depths of his brows and eyes: "I know, Yan Yan I know that your father was with my mother, firstly, to find out where your uncle hid the body of your aunt, secondly, to compensate you for your superior and wealthy living environment, and thirdly... thirdly, to I hope that one day, I can kill my mother with my own hands."

Lin Yan didn't expect Ling Wang to be so calm.He didn't want to be compared, to make himself look like an idiot who only knew how to yell and curse, so he also tried to calm himself down; but unexpectedly, Ling Wang's next sentence immediately made him unable to calm down.

"Also, my mother actually knows about all of this." Ling Wang looked deeply at Lin Yan, the compassion in his eyes was indescribable, "That's right, although Uncle Lin did kill my mother in the end, but My mother let him kill on purpose."

"It was she who took the initiative and fulfilled Uncle Lin's revenge."

"Oh, how should I put it, my mother and your mother, no matter how much they hate each other in this life, harm each other, steal each other's things, steal each other's men... But after all, after all, they are still sisters. And they are twins with the most sympathy The kind of things that are inherent in the blood can't be denied and can't be changed."

Ling Wang's words were very convincing, what's more, what's more, what he said was very well-founded, with a gentle attitude and a calm attitude.The astonishing fact that Qiao Xiaowei "asked for his own death" indeed subverted Lin Yan's absolute cognition of self-righteousness in the past ten years, and he was greatly shocked.The table was full of delicious food, he was obviously not full yet, but suddenly he couldn't eat anything.

He felt nauseous and powerless.

Standing up unsteadily while leaning on the table, Lin Yan decided to leave.This room, this sad room full of grievances and gathering ghosts, he really couldn't stay in it for a minute, a moment, a tiny bit.

Ling Wang didn't stop it, because he knew what Lin Yan had decided, so it would be useless for him to stop him.Getting up to send Lin Yan to the door, Ling Wang thought for a while, and couldn't help asking: "Yanyan, you are not in [Beloved] now, so what did you do a while ago..."

Lin Yan heard something wrong, and suddenly frowned and interrupted Ling Wang: "What? Wait, what is it called, not in [Beloved] anymore?"

"Huh? You...you don't know?" Ling Wang was taken aback, and subconsciously raised his voice, "Didn't you leave [Beloved] on your own initiative? Where did you go a few days ago? You didn't even do such a big thing You know? The nightclub circle in S City has been rumored to be crazy, [Beloved]'s new ranking is out, and the number one position is no longer...you."

Seeing that Lin Yan's reaction was calm and his expression was pretty good, Ling Wang hesitated for a while and then added hesitantly: "Not only the ranking list, but also [Beloved]... you're already gone."

Actually hearing this, Lin Yan could still accept it, it doesn't matter.The beauty is late, sick and sick, and maybe one day he will die, so Lin Yan has long been fully prepared to be kicked out of the altar.Until I heard Ling Wang's next sentence.

"The new one on the list, my uncle will hold a welcome party for him in [Beloved] in a few days, and then... when the time comes, Xia Zhaoshi will also go."

"What did you say!?" Lin Yan turned her face and stared at Ling Wang, her eyes were so sharp that she seemed to want to make two bloody holes in Ling Wang's body, she said every word, gnashing her teeth, "Xia , Zhao, Shi? What did Xia Zhaoshi do!?"

Ling Wang was very puzzled by Lin Yan's overly violent reaction, and asked in confusion: "What else can you do? You should know the rules of [Beloved] better than me, Yanyan. The new number one on the list, who will be the first?" Bao him, as the big benefactor, of course wants to join in the show."

Yes, of course, to join in the show.

Xia Zhaoshi asked someone else.Don't tell him, don't tell him, don't even say hello to him in advance.

He keeps saying you are mine, but he never asks for it.

Xia Zhaoshi, how could you treat me like this.

When I was still fighting hard, desperately wanting to live...for you, desperately wanting to live, I wanted someone else.

"..." Lin Yan closed his eyes, "Who is it?" He asked these two words with difficulty in a hoarse voice; then he waited patiently and silently, a name that deserved to be hacked into pieces and struck by lightning .

Ling Wang thought for a long time, but his tone was not very sure: "I'm not too sure about this. It seems to be a mixed race. As for the name, I forgot."

Lin Yan moved his eyelids weakly.Mixed race? ... Oh, well, he got it.

It turned out to be Cecil, the half-foreign devil possessed by Tom Sue.Lin Yan smiled lightly, there are so many sluts in this world, Lin Yan is really lucky for three generations, in his short life, he has met all the best.

"When is the welcome party?"

Hearing Lin Yan's question, Ling Wang unnaturally changed his face, hesitated a few times, and replied softly: "Just a few days... the 22nd, at eight o'clock in the evening."

On that day, Lin Yan turned 29 years old.

Lin Yan's birthday is at midnight on June 22, but it can also be said to be at 21:24 on June [-].It's hard to tell whether his zodiac sign is Gemini or Cancer, but Lin Yan feels ironic when he thinks about it occasionally: his life is just like the attributes of these two zodiac signs. Like "wind" and "water", it is always displaced and has no settlement.

There is nothing so easy.Looking up to face the bright sun, Lin Yan narrowed his eyes slightly, thinking so.At least with Lin Yan, it is not so easy to rob the man Lin Yan likes.