Embrace each other

Chapter 19

Bai Fei’s days are more lively than ever, she likes to bring everyone together, no matter how busy we are, she always has a way to make everyone show up at the same time, even the busiest Cheng Weige can make it on time return.Of course, it is reasonable for him to come back out of hospitality.But for Bai Yu who has always refused to participate on the grounds of lack of time or who is often late, I don't understand. Before, he came back as late as he could, but these days he came back within a minute. One day, I couldn't hold back the yin and yang and said to Bai Yu who had just entered the door: It's really the sun coming out from the west.In the past, he must have ignored me, but today the sun really came out from the west. He looked at me first, and then said very calmly when he passed me: Don’t understand how to use time reasonably? .

Based on the events of the previous few days, I prefer to understand that this is his direct protest against Bai Fei and I going to the hospital to bother him. Speaking of which, I really can’t blame me for this fact.When Bai Fei came back with great difficulty, he caught up with Bai Yu and took in a critically ill patient. He got up early every day, not to mention late at night, and sometimes didn’t return home at night, so the two of them rarely saw each other, let alone sat down and chatted to get closer to each other. .So Bai Fei ran to the hospital every day on the grounds of "earning for his younger brother".

In the evening, when Bai Yu was on duty, she bought supper and waited in Bai Yu's lounge. She didn't even miss the short lunch time. In short, the image of sibling affection is very strong.Within a few days, everyone in the hospital knew that Bai Yu had a beautiful and gentle sister who loved him very much.Although I don't understand, why did she pick me up when she was doing these things, just because she needed a driver?After all, my relationship with Bai Yu is still at the stage of the last quarrel, and my stubborn self-esteem does not allow me to forgive him just like that.

At first, I also strictly abided by the duty of a driver, bowed my head to eat and never disturbed "clients".As time goes by, I will also be unable to hold back to make a few words, of course, only limited to white nonsense.Just when I was getting used to this kind of meaningless chat and dinner, Bai Yu's sudden words really caught me by surprise, so I completely felt the pleasure of a whole wonton from my throat to my stomach.

He said: That day, sorry.

As I coughed violently, I was thinking about what happened that day when he said I'm sorry.

Finally, after racking my brains for a while, I located it at the last time we communicated, that is, the day I picked up Bai Fei at the airport.

Because that day, he accidentally kissed my forehead, so he felt sorry.

"It's okay, in a sense I was wrong too."

Bai Yu, who is wearing a white coat, is personable and looks calm and harmless, especially in the quiet midnight.There was a trace of tiredness on his fair and handsome face, but it was this inadvertent tiredness that invisibly added the charm of a mature man to him.

He was standing opposite the desk, holding in his hand the love supper that Bai Fei and I sent tonight, condescendingly, looking at me quietly and intently.

In this situation, forgive me for being unable to control myself. My mind is full of the moment when his lips are printed on my forehead at the airport and the slippery touch.

"You, you, drink some water." Bai Yu picked up his cup and put it in my hand, his tired voice made his voice much softer.

"No, no, I'll drink soup"

I took two gulps of the soup, and unconsciously looked at the still-closed eyes, it must have been too long for Bai Fei to go to the toilet.

In any case, the arrival of Bai Fei has greatly eased the relationship between Bai Yu and me. From avoiding seeing, turning a blind eye, listening, and hearing to now being able to occasionally catch up with a few words in small talk, although this does not eliminate the The estrangement caused by the last illness, but fortunately, it has eased.

Speaking of what happened last time, I think that thorn has been deeply embedded in my heart, and it is basically difficult to heal, but it’s okay, this is just another traumatic point that sprouted on the road of my love for him , It is not uncommon over the years, I have long been used to it, and a person who is used to sadness can always learn to find an outlet in sadness, and then regenerate his courage to continue to meet sadness.

Moreover, based on past experience, I am more willing to bear the pain now than to stay away from him and lose his news. After all, the thoughts that go deep into the bone marrow and cannot be seen are too insignificant compared to these.

Qinghai Lake is the most frequently discussed topic when we get together. I have searched for information about it on the website more than once. At the request of the third child, Bai Fei has already talked about that beautiful and mysterious lake for the nth time. The place.Bai Fei said that it was like heaven, pure and transparent, and every time he heard it, the third child's eyes shone with gold. If it wasn't for the oppression of money, he would really be able to set off immediately, and take a journey as soon as he wants.

The third child likes freedom, and is born with unruly wildness in his bones. It doesn't need someone who is very familiar with him, as long as anyone who has seen him can almost see it, Bai Fei made the most appropriate description of the third child, She said, the third child is just a weed among you, the most impersonal one, as long as he is willing to leave you in minutes.

But he is the youngest among the few of us, and no one has ever expected him to do something. As long as he doesn't cause trouble and lives in a healthy and healthy way, he is considered a high-spirited person.

"Sister Bai Fei, you take me with you, I take my brother's money and maybe I can bring a little girlfriend or something, let's go" the third child was full of interest.

"I'll let you finish your credits. Before that, only brother has no money." Cheng Wei said with a serious face, staring at a bunch of fluctuating bars on the computer.

"Brother, can you be a little bit interesting? After get off work, you are always holding on to your credits and the stock market. Are you tired?" the third child complained.

"Not tired" Cheng Weige continued to stare at the computer, his attitude towards the unruly and willful third child is usually steady and ruthless, and he never talks nonsense, so the third child among us is most afraid of him.

"Brother Bai Yu, have you ever been to Qinghai Lake?"

The third child couldn't get a bargain from Brother Cheng Wei, so the topic turned to Bai Yu who was holding his mobile phone and didn't know what to look at.

"No," Bai Yu replied almost at the same time, but he never took his eyes off the phone, typing with his fingers quickly as if he was chatting with others, not interested in participating in the topic in front of him,

"However, I heard that the scenery is very good." After finishing speaking, he paused with his fingers and continued to add.

"I heard that it is the most meaningless and time-wasting thing. Why don't you go and see it so close?" The third child was full of regret, as if he was the one who missed the scenery.

"There's no point in going alone"

Bai Fei rushed ahead of Bai Yu and answered first, but Bai Yu seemed to have no objection to this answer, as if he acquiesced, and continued to look at the phone.

"When he was alone? Who would believe it? Do you believe it? Do you believe it? Sister, do you believe it or not?" The third child smiled and pointed at us as if he had heard a big joke. One lap, and finally stopped at me.

I hesitated for a moment, carefully weighed the consequences of answering this question, and finally chose to shake my head silently based on Bai Yu's current emotional state.

"Look, my sister doesn't believe it"

As soon as the third child finished speaking, a bunch of extremely unfriendly gazes from the side immediately stopped on me. I knew without looking at it. Although the answer was fair and true, the person concerned was unwilling to accept the evaluation given to him by outsiders.

So I interrupted the third child in time and corrected:

"Hey, don't misinterpret what I mean, I shook my head to say, I don't know if I don't believe it"

"Pfft..."

"Humph…"

Apparently, ginger is still old and hot, and the third child jumped at me with all his teeth and claws,

When we grow up, we lose the lawlessness of children and add the so-called maturity and wisdom. Therefore, in the restraint of these rules and regulations, the things we can do when we get together are very ordinary, nothing more than eating and chatting.And under these extremely normal patterns, we seem to always have endless chats and endless teasing, it seems that even these extremely ordinary things are a luxury in the past few years.

"Wei Xiaoduo, you coward, watch your tricks"

I grabbed the pillow next to me and blocked it in front of me to prevent the third brother from accidentally hurting my untidy hairstyle. Unexpectedly, the third child's claws did not fall, and were stopped in mid-air.

"How grown up, still so noisy"

I took the pillow away and saw that it was Bai Yu holding the third child who got up with his hands, and I escaped from the clutches temporarily.

"Don't you believe it, Bai Yu said that it's boring to go alone, the implication is that the beautiful scenery handed down from generation to generation will naturally have a special taste if you take the person you like to see it."

After Bai Fei finished speaking, there was a burst of laughter, including me of course, the most brilliant and bitterest laugh.

Laughing all the time, I always feel that Bai Fei meant something when she said this sentence, because the look in her glance at me was not so simple, but contained a layer of deep meaning that I couldn't understand.

Bai Fei is Bai Fei, she felt that she would not leave the answer at the end like a suspense novel, she suddenly cleared her throat, and said to me very crisply amidst a burst of laughter:

"Xiaoduo, it's getting cold in Qinghai, you should wear more clothes then"

Originally, this sentence was very common, but it was too inappropriate to say it now, which directly confirmed what she meant.Everyone stopped laughing because of her words, especially the third child's eyes drifted back and forth between me and Bai Yu, Cheng Weige also looked away from the computer screen, and turned to look at me.

I couldn't figure out why Bai Fei said that suddenly, maybe she saw my thoughts on Bai Yu, and of course I denied this idea the moment it popped out of my mind.If it's not because of this, then it's because she intends to match us up. No matter what the reason is, the result is the same, and it's doomed to nothing.

Because everyone here knows that Bai Yu has a girlfriend and has been in love with her for many years. The girl he wants to take to Qinghai Lake is not me, but Full Moon, the full moon that I can't forget even if I was drunk many years ago.

It's also the person she wants to see when she comes back this time.

At this moment, apart from embarrassment, I was still embarrassed. In the cramped state, I suddenly wanted to know Bai Yu's expression. Sometimes actions are always more honest than thoughts. When I realized this thought, my eyes had already unconsciously looked at Bai Yu.

He frowned slightly, and his slender fingers stopped on a certain interface of the phone, as if they were still. Suddenly he raised his head and looked at Bai Fei, with his thin lips slightly parted, as if to say something.

My mind is racing, what am I supposed to say to get ahead of him and prove I haven't thought much about it.

"Sister Bai Fei, you're too messed up. Brother Bai Yu has a girlfriend, what's her name? It's just the prettiest girl in your school. She's pretty and talented."

The third child patted his head with one hand and pointed at me with the other. I have told him the name of Man Yue many times, but he can't always remember it.

"Sister, it's the one who used to be in trouble, you know, what's his name?"

"full moon"

After I finished speaking, I pretended to be calm and picked up the kumquats on the coffee table, stuffed one in my mouth, and the strong sourness instantly invaded the whole mouth, and then soared all the way until I choked my nose and tears.

I hate sour, I hate astringent, and I hate the taste of sour and astringent mixed together.

"Who is Man Yue?" Bai Fei asked.

"My mother must have been deceived. When she bought it, she clearly said that this kumquat is [-] cents more expensive than others, because it is sweet."

I coughed and complained loudly, trying to end the topic.

"Don't take such a big mouthful, what about the seeds, did you spit them out?"

Brother Cheng Wei came over with a glass of water, patted my back and asked.

"Brother, if I swallow it, will a tree grow on top of my head tomorrow?"

My tearful eyes must be so pitiful, just thinking about it makes me want to hug myself.

As for who the full moon is, the answer is finally submerged in my intentional farce and Bai Yu's silence.But it didn't take long for Bai Yu to give the answer in another way, which caught us off guard and ate the dog food of love.

Bai Fei's return flight was scheduled for the day after tomorrow, after she repeatedly checked with me about the rest time. She insisted on asking me to drop me off, but I couldn't shirk it.

So in the next two days, I turned on the vacation mode and acted as a tour guide. The so-called places are just those places we played when we were young. We can find them with our eyes closed, and there is almost no technical difficulty.

I also thought about taking her to the best tourist spots in the province, but Bai Fei insisted on this.She said that she owed Bai Yu her entire childhood, and this has become a regret that she and her family will never make up for in their entire lives.

Bai Fei wants to participate in the part of Bai Yu's life that she missed in this way, and I will definitely support it with all my strength.In the past, I always felt that Bai Yu was unfortunate, but now it seems that he has never lost the love of his parents, but the way they love is too cruel.

Due to the tight schedule, I thought about it carefully and finally decided on the place where I first fell in love with Bai Yu. Of course, I didn't do it deliberately, but I just recalled our childhood and youth. It seems that I have never walked out of this alley, so the few trips to the river beach have become the clearest part in my memory.

It's strange to think about it. It seems so monotonous and boring now, but at that time we could always play different tricks.

Since Brother Cheng Wei had a meeting at the last moment, and Bai Yu's outpatient clinic was not over yet, Bai Fei and I prepared our things and went to Xiahetan in advance, and took out all the things for the barbecue later.As soon as we put our things away, we saw the third child walking towards us with a beautiful girl.

"Do you know each other?" Bai Fei asked as he watched the two people approaching.

"Ah Qi, A Zi, A Yu, or A Yuan, who knows, there are so many names, I don't know which one can be the right name." I thought about it seriously and said.

"Hey, it's a pity that the girl like a flower and a jade has to fall in love with such a prodigal son"

That's right, but the prodigal son is the one who is qualified to dominate the love scene, I hate him.

Bai Fei looked at the two people approaching, shook his head helplessly, and seemed to think of something, turned around and asked me:

"Bai Yu was like this before?"

"A good-looking person, is there a little bit of anecdotes and erotic history?" I asked back

"not fresh"

If I tell her that Bai Yu has carried more flowers with his bicycle than the names I just said, it's hard to imagine that Bai Fei will be proud of it, and he still has the urge to kill him every minute like me.

"Sister, this is January," the third child introduced

"Hello, sisters." The girl is well-behaved, she looks like her name, and her temperament is as bright as a full moon, but she is light and just right.After all, when we met for the first time, the girl was a little shy, with her white and slender hands folded in front of her body, rubbing her thumbs together, as if to relieve her inner anxiety.

I know that the third child has always had a good eye, but it is beyond my expectation that he likes this kind of girl who looks like a lotus in clear water. I thought that the people with him were all charming and colorful girls.

While appreciating the eyes of the third child, I silently lamented that youth is perishable and others are easy to grow old.

Before that, I never felt that I was actually far away from my youth.

Yuan Yue, Yuan Yue, her brain reflexively searched for this name in the third child's roster, wait a minute, isn't this the girl the third child wanted to hook up with Tagore some time ago?

From this point of view, he has fulfilled his wish, and the time he spent with Bai Yu day and night was not in vain.

At the next moment, a dishonorable thought suddenly came to mind. If this lovely and pitiful girl regretted her injustice because of the broken heart of the youngest one day later, would Bai Yu be punished for it?

Well, the idea is too bad, no matter what, I still wish this girl can avoid disaster and escape from the clutches of the third child as soon as possible.

"You're welcome, did you see, the whole place is just playing casually"

Bai Fei showed the posture of being the head of the house, pointing to the river beach behind him that he couldn't see at a glance.

The girl nodded with a smile, and was dragged by the third child to enjoy the scenery.

"Sister, just now you fully demonstrated the demeanor of a big sister in society"

Looking at the backs of Lao San and Yuan Yue, I couldn't help reminding.

"It seems my passion is like a fire"

"Well, it's a little hot, but"

I looked her up and down, then at Yuan Yue not far away, and pretended to be mysterious and said:

"Believe me, it won't be long before you will be so shy"

As soon as the words fell, there was a sound of a car engine from far to near, and finally stopped on the shore, Bai Fei looked at it, and suddenly, his brows were filled with joy.

For this kind of tacit situation, naturally we don't need too many words, and we both looked at each other and smiled.

"You discovered it all"

"You didn't intend to hide it"

"Why do you have to hide it? It's hard to meet someone you like. You hide it and keep it in your dreams when you're old."

"What are your plans, don't you want to go back?"

"Liking has nothing to do with going back, Xiaoduo, the key is that you don't have the will to win. To Cheng Wei, I am sure to win."

I looked at Bai Fei, and my heart was full of envy. I envied that she could fall in love with someone who had nothing to do with her past, and envied that she could be fearless because of this.

"Sister-in-law, mighty"

“Small mouth is so sweet”

Bai Fei is accompanied by Cheng Viagra. Although the sister-in-law lacks tenderness, it is better than the uncertainty brought about by other people.

At least, in the days to come, I won't have a headache because of how to maintain a relationship with a stranger.

It was said to be a dinner party, but after everyone ate and drank, they were happily playing in their respective worlds. The third child and Yuan Yue were like glue, flirting and flirting.Bai Fei also talked and laughed with Brother Cheng Wei in the grand plan that he was determined to win, and they got along happily.

From the looks of it, it was a fraternity.And I acted as the planner. Without the nourishment of love, I can only watch the back of the person I miss and talk on the phone with others.

These years, I have been thinking about a question, do I simply like him, or is it because he picked me up from the water that year that I have to rely on him for so many years, the answer is of course no problem.

I can only comfort myself with destiny, otherwise why was he the one who picked me up from the water? I turned into Nezha, but God didn't consider that I, a dying person, has a mortal body and has all kinds of emotions, how could I resist this temptation.

I don't know if it's a coincidence, but Bai Yu wore the same clothes as last time today, a white sports suit, sunny and handsome, the black watch on his wrist reflected a dazzling circle of light in the sun, his slender fingers tapped on the back of the phone, Although he couldn't hear his words clearly, it was not difficult to guess who was on the other end of the phone from the occasional smile on his mouth.

Such a good opportunity, why didn't you come with the full moon, and meet this famous sister-in-law by the way.

Facts have proved that I am not a magnanimous person. When I think of this, the sourness in my heart can come out of my mouth.

I took out my phone and checked the time. I wanted to make a phone call with my second child to relieve my depression, but now it seems that the only possibility is gone.At three o'clock in the afternoon, he must be at work, and it is easy to imagine his current state, which is nothing more than facing a bunch of cold machines with affection.

The cold and indifferent man in science and engineering can only release his enthusiasm when facing his research results.

It seems that besides me, among the few of us who are betting alone, there is another one.

It's not bad to think about it, when he is old and the fallen leaves return to their roots, at least there will be more companions to chat with me in the nursing home.

"Why are you so obsessed? In this situation, do you really regret not being drowned?"

The brain circuit is still planning for the beautiful pension, Bai Yu's voice is from top to bottom, I am sitting on the ground, it sounds very oppressive.

This is the first time in a long time that he took the initiative to talk to me without anything.

Feeling in love?Of course not, he quickly proved that I was once again being self-indulgent.

I tried my best to raise my head, trying to make him see as clearly as possible the dissatisfaction I had with him because of this sentence. He is very tall, especially in this perspective, he looks even more upright.The result was obvious, until the crisp "gaba" sound came from the cervical spine, I also failed to give him a supercilious look.

"Well, I regret it later, so in the future, don't save people when you see them, maybe they really want to die."

I clutched my neck that was still in pain, and said unkindly.

"I'm a doctor. It's my job to save lives and heal the wounded. However, if you want to die, don't let me see it. Maybe the chance of success will be higher."

Bai Yu walked up to me and sat down.

I don't understand what it means, maybe he really wants to have a long talk with me on this issue, please, is the doctor so stressed that he is so perverted that he can teach people how to die.

"Besides, the last time you did it because of a rape, it was somewhat unworthy"

In front of you, the water surface is swayed by layers of microwaves under the blowing of the autumn wind, and the surging waves accumulate into gentle waves, washing the sand under your feet wave by wave, and the clear and eye-catching sand is shining brilliantly under the sunlight. , along the banks of the river, the grass is lush and the trees are dense. In the shade, the third child whispers to the girl he likes softly, and the girl has a smile on her face like a flower.

On such a beautiful day, the man I have admired for a long time actually seriously discussed with me how unworthy it is that I died because of a dick.

I'd like to ask him, because it's not worth dying for a cock, and because a cock likes someone so much that he doesn't even dare to say it, he can only let it grow and spread in his heart, and even this life is doomed Is it worth living alone?

I was indignant about it, but I could only be indignant in my heart.

"Then I would like to ask Dr. Bai, who saved the dying and healed the wounded, why is my death worthwhile?"

Bai Yu turned his head and looked me up and down for a while, then turned his mouth to Bai Fei and Cheng Wei who were fishing not far away.

"Because of this" he said

I followed his direction and saw that Bai Fei and Cheng Weige were happy to catch a fish. Looking at it from my distance, although I didn't think there was anything to celebrate about the little finger-sized fish on the hook, But Bai Fei didn't think so, he happily hugged Cheng Weige's arm and swayed from side to side.

Of course I know that she is not a fisherman, but a fisherman.Still, I couldn't help laughing out loud at her obvious expression.

If things go on like this, Cheng Weige, the city that has been defended for many years, will already be brought under Bai Fei's command without waiting for the return journey.

"What should I do, I'm afraid I'll disappoint you, I don't want to die"

Maybe my attitude made him suspicious, Bai Yu looked at me inquiringly, and I looked back at him in a daze, making my meaning clearer.

"Are you retreating in spite of difficulties or are you trying to capture the old people?" Bai Yu's expression gradually became serious, exactly the same as that day in the hospital.

Undoubtedly, his gaze caused me to lose this contest quickly. I turned my head to look at the river, and my heart gradually became clear.

"In your heart, I really hope that I will retreat in spite of difficulties."

I turned my head to look at him again, like the kind of pride shown when I saw through his tricks when I was a child.Bai Yu didn't speak, but I still keenly caught the flickering fluctuation in his eyes.

You see, we understand each other, so there is no need to beat around the bush.

"Just tell me directly, don't use those little cleverness and unscrupulous methods on your sister. It's better to be simple and straightforward. Are you tired after going around such a big circle?"

I picked up a stone casually and threw it hard towards the water surface. Immediately afterwards, ripples rippled on the river surface.

"Okay, Doctor Bai, just put your heart in your stomach. If you say that I haven't made any progress over the years, then you will really wrong me, especially when it comes to the matter of when to quit."

There is a style of painting that I will never learn. For example, just now, if I let go of my secret self-esteem and cried with Lihua hugging him in the rain, will he feel a little pity for me and regret that he once treated me Say such heavy words.

"Wei Xiaoduo, I"

I got up and patted the sand on my body. Suddenly, my hand was held by Bai Yu, and I didn't look back at him. If there were no such messy and confusing dialogues, I would be ecstatic at this moment.

On the contrary, after the conversation just now, if he said thank you to me, or showed any guilt emotions, it would instantly collapse my backlog of emotions, so I didn't wait for him to finish speaking.

"Okay, I understand. I don't need to apologize or be moved. I'm not so willful as to be hopeless. Besides, Bai Fei is your sister. You should be worried about her, but don't forget, she It's also my friend. Although I haven't known each other for a long time, she is the only female friend in my life who doesn't hate me and I happen to not hate her. However, we are even, if I told you this earlier, Didn't you come here with the full moon today, and you don't need to hold the phone to see things and think about others, right?"

Using the strength on my wrist, I turned around, and Bai Yu was looking at me blankly.That's right, he must have not been able to get used to a villain who was still doing whatever he could for his ends a few days ago, yet he found his conscience back so quickly.

At this time, out of human instinct, I felt that it was necessary for me to re-implement the meaning of not getting better without profit, so I pouted at the pile of rubbish beside me and said:

"The way you express your gratitude, for the tens of thousands of little lives by the river, Doctor Bai has worked hard."

Bai Yu didn't speak, but let go of my hand after I finished speaking.

The residual temperature was quickly blown away by the wind, and I drove away alone without disturbing anyone.

On the way back, looking through the rearview mirror, Bai Yu was still sitting there, his back was a little lonely in the afterglow of the setting sun.Suddenly, it was like going back to the day when grandma passed away, the back of him kneeling beside the bed was the same as now.I stayed with him all night that day, during which none of us said a word, just stared at him behind his back in a daze.I think as long as I'm around, he won't feel alone.Now, I have grown up, I am sensible, and I should be braver, but I don't even have the right to sit beside him and be silent.

You are not his family, not his lover, not even a friend.Time pushes us forward, and one day, when you see clearly that he never belonged to you, and you are only a small part of the whole memory, you will understand that the love you got along day and night has long since become The mottled rust in the fleeting years is vulnerable.

Pain is inevitable, but call it "growing" with people if you like.

Goodbye, I will never change in the years and years.

For the rest of my life, I will learn to accept people and things other than you, no, other than you.

Although it is difficult, if this is inevitable, what right do I have to refuse to grow up.