bother you

Chapter 61

"Zhaofan has gone to the anti-drug brigade." Shen Xun said on the phone.

Yan Xiao sighed, "He told me."

"You already knew?"

"……Um."

"Then what do you think in your heart?" Shen Xun asked: "You knew it earlier, so you are still staying in Xun City?"

"I..." Yan Xiao paused, "I have to hand in my graduation thesis next semester, and I still need to take a make-up exam."

"It's not Brother Xiao, graduation thesis, make-up exams, are these the most important things now?"

"Why not? I managed to get admitted to such a prestigious university, so I can't just leave without taking my diploma."

Shen Xun sighed slightly, "Brother Xiao, don't fool me. What is most important and what is second, you know better than me!"

Yan Xiao lit a cigarette, inhaled too hard, choked, and coughed violently several times.

"Shancheng is different from ours here. The anti-drug situation has always been very serious. Once Zhaofan goes to the anti-drug brigade, let alone whether it is dangerous or not, the management of anti-drug police is different from ordinary special police. I won’t see you for a few years.” Shen Xun said: “What is the concept of a few years? Have you thought about it? I don’t know where you are now, but there is no definite relationship after all, right?”

Yan Xiao shook his head and said softly, "It's just a friend."

Shen Xun raised his voice, "It's just a friend, and it's still just a friend. If he leaves, there will be three to five years in the middle, so you don't even think about it!"

"I don't want to be okay." Yan Xiao has been bored in the rented house recently, writing day and night, eating and sleeping very irregularly, mental state is quite bad, and he doesn't bother to shave his beard, so Shen Xun couldn't see him.

"Don't want to?" Shen Xun asked, "What do you mean?"

Yan Xiao supported his forehead and flicked a string of soot, "If I keep thinking about it, when will I be able to come out?"

Shen Xun was silent for a moment, "Do you want to let go?"

Yan Xiao covered his eyes in pain, his hands were cold and his eyelids were hot.

He said hoarsely: "Otherwise, what can I do? I really... have no other choice. "

Shen Xun grew up with him and had never heard him speak in such a tone. Even if he only heard his voice, he could feel his despair and loneliness.

"Brother Xiao, don't worry." Being in two places, Shen Xun could only comfort him as much as possible, "Talk slowly about what's going on."

Yan Xiao smoked one cigarette, then lit another, his bloodshot eyes were empty, "I did something wrong from the beginning. He couldn't accept being with a man, but I insisted on taking advantage of what he gave me. my friendship to persecute him."

"Didn't you get along well in the past six months?" Shen Xun said, "You all live together."

Yan Xiao smiled wryly, "I was the one who forced him, and I forced him to use the method of 'becoming an anti-narcotics policeman' to escape from me!"

"Impossible!" Shen Xun said, "Zhaofan is not a person who escapes easily. Brother Xiao, don't think so. Shancheng is an important anti-drug town, and he chose to go to Shancheng because he already had that ambition. If you..."

"He said it himself." Yan Xiao interrupted suddenly, and then repeated word by word, "He said it himself!"

Shen Xun was puzzled, "What did he say?"

"—For a while, maybe we have figured it out?" Yan Xiao coughed again, "His exact words."

Shen Xun was silent.

"Have you heard it?" Yan Xiao's finger holding the cigarette was trembling, and the ash was falling down, "That man, if he couldn't bear it, he wouldn't say such a thing. He wants me to figure it out. , Only when I figure it out can I let go of this relationship, let go of him, and let him be free!"

"Brother Xiao..."

"My entanglement for the past six months has already made him unbearable." Yan Xiao whispered softly, "I don't know what kind of force he is, I thought he was having a good time. I am so selfish, what right do I have? Say you love him?"

Shen Xun didn't want to see his brother suffer so much.But love is a matter between two people. He has never loved someone deeply like Yan Xiao, nor has he been loved deeply by a person who pursues him like Zhao Fan.He wanted to comfort him, but he couldn't.

Yan Xiao looked up and sighed, "He hoped that I would figure it out, and hope that I would let go. What else can I do? I have no other choice."

"Didn't his original words be 'we'?" Shen Xun was a bystander after all, "If your 'figure it out' is to let go, what about his 'figure it out'? Could it be accepting you?"

Yan Xiao pressed the sore corners of his eyes, "Do you still remember that I told you before that Zhaofan is actually a very gentle person. He rejected your professional girl and thought of each other, so he made a move to let you The dumbfounding thing made everyone think he was a weirdo."

"Do you think his phrase 'we' is also his tenderness?" Shen Xun asked.

"Isn't it? 'Maybe we all figured it out' and 'Maybe you figured it out', isn't the latter more hurtful?" Yan Xiao sighed again, "He...he is really a very good person."

Shen Xun regretted not going directly to Xun City.If it was face to face at this time, at least I could give Yan Xiao a hug.

After a long time, Shen Xun said in a deep voice: "You said in Xia Tian that you dare not play hard to get, you are afraid that you will not be able to do so. Now... are you really planning to give up completely?"

The ashtray in Yan Xiao's hand was already full of cigarette butts, "I want to visit him again in a while, while he is still in Shancheng."

"and then?"

"Then... I don't know."

Shen Xun had no choice but to say: "I'll help you pay attention to the situation in Shancheng. Brother Xiao, no matter whether you decide to continue chasing or let go, you must quickly get out of this state. I am very worried about you. .If Brother Ce finds out, he will be worried too."

Yan Xiao forced a smile, weakly, "...Okay."

Since passing the selection of the anti-drug brigade, life has suddenly changed.I no longer need to be on duty or perform other tasks every day. I spend most of my time familiarizing myself with various drug information and typical cases, and I also have to deal with elite drug detection dogs.

Zhaofan hasn't been back to "Happy Homeland" for half a month. It's not that he doesn't want to go back, but that he really can't spare the time.

Yan Xiao said before that the rent for the two-bedroom and one-living room was paid for one year.

And he only gave Yan Xiao a few months' rent.

After hanging up the phone that day, he felt a little regretful, knowing that he had said the wrong thing.Yan Xiao's words "I understand" fell heavily on the bottom of his heart, making him a little uncomfortable.

It's just that he didn't know that the discomfort was actually heartache.

He really wanted to call Yan Xiao again and explain it carefully.

But what to explain?

Going to the anti-drug brigade is of course an ideal, but there is indeed an escape idea in it.

He really hoped that he could figure it out, and he also hoped that Yan Xiao could figure it out.

If you call to explain again, it is not a real explanation, but a well-intentioned deception.

This matter cannot be erased. After work, he always thinks of Yan Xiao, and he can't find anyone to confide in, so he can only go to the kennel of anti-drug dogs and stay with the German Shepherd who is closest to him. chat".

Drug detection dogs are so smart that they can smell emotions in people.He was in a low mood, and De Shepherd was also unhappy, and accompanied him with drooping eyes, blowing out his nose from time to time.

"Do you want to take a bath?" He rubbed Demu's head, "I take a bath professionally, and I can also give you a massage. I was in a pet beauty salon..."

When thinking of the small shop where he worked part-time, he couldn't help but think of Yan Xiao again.

That summer was full of happy memories, whether it was giving the dog a bath, running in the morning and practicing at night together, or eating supper outside the school gate, there was no worry at all.Even the quarrel, now thinking about it, my heart warms up.

In a blink of an eye, it turns out that we have known each other for so long.

"I've been looking for you for a long time, so I was hiding here." Yu Ke said that he was afraid of sacrifice, so he finally signed up and is now a member of the anti-narcotics brigade. "You can't bathe them this day, they are easy to get sick."

Zhao Fan patted Demu and stood up, "Let's go to training."

"Are you in a bad mood?" Yu Ke asked.

"No."

"He said no, Lulu has been infected with depression by you."

Lulu is the German shepherd just now. She was born majestic, but has a name that is seriously inconsistent with her appearance.

Zhao Fan didn't want to talk about his relationship with Yan Xiao, and said, "I heard from Team Lan that next month at the latest, the team will send a group of team members to the southwest border."

"are you going?"

"Well, I want to get familiar with the situation. Since I have joined the anti-drug brigade, there is no need to stay in Shancheng all the time."

"Then I have to remind you." Yu Ke said, "If your friend's house is not available, please contact the landlord as soon as possible."

Zhaofan thought for a while, "Yes."

This year's New Year's Eve, for many people, has been very sloppy.

There was a serial murder case in Sucheng. Shen Xun was in the Criminal Investigation Detachment of the City Bureau, and participated in the investigation of serious cases for the first time; Running around, even though he has retreated from the front line in name, there are still countless cases waiting for him to personally direct...

Yan Xiao didn't go home, and wrote from morning to night in the rented room.

These days, he is very glad that he still has this job.Only when he devotes himself to writing every day can he temporarily forget Zhaofan.So as long as he is awake, he forces himself to code, letting the characters and conflicts in the novel occupy his entire mind.

The funds in the account continued to grow rapidly, and the author name "Yan Xiao" had rushed to the top of the income list of "Bee Gui", and there was a trend of continuing to catch up.

Even Xiao Song advised him to take his time, money is endless, don't squeeze yourself dry.

But he couldn't stop, because the outburst at this time was not for money at all.

He had to write.

At ten o'clock in the evening, the sound of firecrackers outside became more and more intense, almost covering the ringtone of the mobile phone.

The phone rang over and over again, and he didn't notice the flashing screen beside him until he clicked save.

"Brother Xiao." Zhao Fan's voice came, and his throat suddenly tightened.

"Happy New Year." Zhao Fan said: "After this Spring Festival, I will not be in Shancheng. I contacted the landlord a few days ago and returned my key to him. I cleaned the house and it is very clean. You If you want to come back after finishing your dissertation, you should be able to live there after cleaning up the dust.”

Yan Xiao could only hear the deafening sound of firecrackers, Zhao Fan's voice seemed to be separated by something, and he couldn't hear it clearly at all.

He doesn't want to hear the truth.

"Brother Xiao." Zhao Fan said again, "Then we will meet again when we have a chance in the future."