sinovels Chapter 42 I promise
Chapter 42 I promise
According to Shen Keyan's original plan, he and Chi Yi's first kiss should be in a romantic western restaurant, on a golden beach, under the warm moonlight, at least after they express their hearts to each other, he can frankly When you say you like Chi Yi and you can justifiably hold him in your arms.
Instead of now, in a cramped space, in Chi Yi's astonished eyes, behind the all-pervasive lens, there are still many things that have not been explained clearly between them, and he has not even been able to give Chi Yi a confession.
But he knew that he couldn't help it, not because of Li Yang who took up most of his memories and would always be regarded as an important person by him, not because of those who had witnessed his growth in his most exciting youth, It will also be because of the upcoming confession round.
Thinking of this, Shen Keyan took another step forward, and the two people who were already close became more intimate, and Shen Keyan finally got his wish so that Chi Yi only had his reflection in his eyes.
Chi Yi seemed surprised, but there was no resistance in his eyes. The sunlight hit his side face through the rose bushes, coating his fair skin with a layer of transparent light, which was as clear and pure as his eyes.
Shen Keyan stretched out his hands to cover his eyes, which seemed to be able to see all despicable methods.
Then the other hand went around the back of his neck, letting Chi Yi sink into her arms even deeper, and Shen Keyan just deepened the kiss.
A kiss that was completely ungentlemanly from motive to behavior.
——— "Mr. Shen, Mr. Xiaochi, are you all right?" Xiao Wang waited outside the flower bed for a long time, but no one came out. When he saw someone coming, he couldn't help shouting: "It seems There are leaders coming."
Chi Yi pushed Shen Keyan away irritably, and then remembered that he was no longer a puppy lover who needed to be afraid of the leader.
The corners of the lips were still obviously swollen, clearly declaring how hard Shen Keyan worked just now, Chi Yi resisted the urge to use his hands, and raised his head to meet Shen Keyan's gaze: "Is it swollen?"
The eyes are still full of emotion because of the emotion, and the ear tips are red but the expression is very stubborn, as if trying to use the ravaged lips to arouse the guilt of the perpetrator.
"A little bit." Shen Keyan still controlled the back of his neck, then lowered his head and kissed the corner of his lips.
With deep eyes: "Very beautiful."
So beautiful that the perpetrator wanted to kiss him desperately, leaving his own mark on him, Shen Keyan lowered his eyes, suppressing the plunder in his eyes.
Chi Yi didn't really want to hear him apologize, after all, just now Shen Keyan just did what he wanted to do, but why is he so shy and Shen Keyan can still deal with it calmly?
Chi Yi was furious!
Then he stood on tiptoe, stretched out his hand to pick Shen Keyan's chin, and took a bite on it.
"That's only fair."
Half a minute later, two well-dressed people came out one after another, pushing aside the flowering branches, and stood in front of the camera with serious faces.
With bright red lips and obvious teeth marks on his chin, Xiao Wang suddenly began to worry about whether the things in his camera could be broadcast... The two of them tacitly never mentioned this kiss again.
After wandering around the campus again, rejecting the program team's suggestion to visit their teacher, Chi Yi and Shen Keyan left the school.
"The teacher who taught me back then just happened to be in the third year of high school this year, and now he must be struggling with how to 'supplement' the students. If they really go there, they may not be comfortable facing the camera, and it will delay the study of the younger students. It's too sinful."
In order to ensure a quiet environment for the students, when the first high school was established, it was specially selected to be far away from the commercial street. It was also a weekday, except for the restaurant on the opposite side, which was still open and the street was very deserted.
Chi Yi and Shen Keyan went to try the stir-fried dishes recommended by fans.
The fourth filming ended here, the program team left according to the original itinerary, and Chi Yi led Shen Keyan to walk in the opposite direction.
"Come on, it's time to get down to business."
—— Chi Yi took Shen Keyan back to his home.
"It's a bit small and messy, I hope I didn't disappoint you." Chi Yi opened the door and took Shen Keyan into the living room. His parents knew in advance that he would bring Shen Keyan back and specially prepared new slippers.
Compared with the house Shen Keyan lived in, or even the apartment Chi Yi rented in Qingyuan, this house is indeed small, with a simple three-bedroom and one living room. Standing at the entrance, the layout of the whole house can be seen at a glance. The kitchen and living room are separated by a door. With the glass door separated, Shen Keyan felt that if cooking at home at this distance, the living room would inevitably be stained with oily smoke.
Sofa, coffee table, bookcase, TV, refrigerator, these eye-catching furniture and home appliances can be seen from the style and brand to be old, but because they have been carefully taken care of, they are still new. Fresh lilies are placed on the coffee table and dining table. Behind the TV The walls are full of hangings, a large family portrait in the middle is surrounded by various certificates, and it is specially covered with cellophane.
Curtains, tablecloths, and sofas are all cute little florals, and the wall behind the sofa is covered with photo frames. From two people to three people, from only staying in Dad’s arms to Chi Yi, who is taller than Dad, it’s just a living room Old people can clearly perceive: this is not a house, this is a home.
"It's very warm." Shen Keyan said.
Chi Yi smiled: "Let's go, I'll show you my room."
Chi Yi brought Shen Keyan to a blue door, and pointed to the opposite bedroom: "This is my parents' room, and the one next to it is the study. But my parents don't often work at home, so most of them are my parents' room." s things."
The house was bought when his parents got married. The two young people who had just started working and had no family support saved enough money for a down payment for a small house after two years of frugality. They didn’t have any relatives, so they didn’t think about it Staying in the guest room, even the study room was remodeled with a storage room after Chi Yi grew up.
A [-]-square-meter house for three people is actually not too small, but parents are like this. They always want to give their children a better life on the basis of their ability. I heard that a colleague has set up a piano room for their children. They will consider changing to a bigger house, etc. Chi Yi went to junior high school and felt that the child needs more space when he grows up, so he thought about changing the house. Later, he heard that boys of Chi Yi's age like the game room and thought about it too.
But when I bought the house, I bought it close to Yigao. Later, Qingle’s key junior high school was also built in the nearby Zhengzhong school district, so the two elders thought about waiting for Chi Yi to finish high school, but later Chi Yi chose to act. , They never thought about changing the house again, and they were all about saving money to pay the down payment for their son to save their future.
Chi Yi withdrew his mixed feelings and pushed open the door: "Welcome to my past."
Knowing that he was coming back, his father probably stayed up all night to clean up his room again, and there was still a faint smell of laundry detergent in the clean and tidy air.
"Sit wherever you want." Ike pointed to the small tatami mat on the floor and the chair in front of the desk.
Shen Keyan sat on his bed.
Chi Yi: ...That's fine, anyway, that's not the point.
Thinking of the point of this visit, Chi Yi licked his lips and felt a little embarrassed for no reason. He actually didn't know where to start.
"I'll come first," Shen Keyan said lightly: "Wait for me, I'll go get something."
This is a little different from what he thought.
His original plan was to tell Shen Keyan all about his past, and then take advantage of Shen Keyan's heartache to coax him to confess his secrets, but judging by Shen Keyan's attitude, I think he was already ready to confess to him ?
Chi Yi blinked, watching Shen Keyan walk out of the bedroom and come back with a folder.
"This is mine, the medical record book." Although he had prepared for a long time, when he really wanted to peel himself off and show it to Chi Yi, Shen Keyan still couldn't help becoming nervous.
"I originally planned to find a chance to tell you after the show ended." At that time, Shen Keyan thought that although Chi Yi was good at acting, he was still young. He was worried that he would not be able to hide his emotions well and show his feet in front of the camera, so he simply waited until the show was over. tell him.
If you want to stay and follow his will, at least this show can successfully pave the way for Chi Yi.
Unexpectedly, he discovered his anomaly so early: "Instead of hiding it and letting you investigate bit by bit, it's better for me to tell you directly."
If you are sad, I can still hug you, if you want to leave, I still have a chance to keep you.
Chi Yi looked at the medical records stuffed into his arms: "You know?"
"Guess." Shen Ke said with a smile: "Did you suspect it because you saw me taking medicine?"
Shen Tingbai hadn't had time to contact Chi Yi yet, but Chi Yi did take his "sugar" to the psychological counseling office, but it doesn't matter how he was exposed.
Shen Keyan squatted down and looked at Chi Yi who was sitting on the tatami: "Don't be afraid, I'm here."
Chi Yi's eyes trembled slightly, and he opened the thick medical record book in his hand.
From Shen Keyan on the first page, just as his gaze settled, Chi Yi's eyes turned red from the sentence "obvious suicidal tendencies".
A sigh came from his ear, and Shen Keyan's warm hands fell into his hair, and the next second he was hugged into a familiar embrace: "It's okay, it's all over."
The first time Shen Keyan knew that he was sick was his 13th birthday.
At that time, Zhuang Yan had been driven almost mad by Shen Cong's cold violence and affairs again and again. What Shen Keyan was most worried about every day was that if he didn't pay attention, she didn't know where there would be another scar, and he was even more afraid that there would be another scar on her body. There will be no chance of one more scar.
He watched Mingli's gentle mother become agitated, strange and hideous, but there was nothing he could do about it. At that time, he seemed to have no advantages other than being the only grandchild in the Shen family tree, such as outstanding grades, versatility, and gentleness There is no use in that family where nothing but quarreling and crying every day, he can only rely on Mr. Shen's love to fight for a little freedom for himself and his mother.
But later, Mr. Shen also passed away, and Shen Cong became even more unscrupulous.
Shen Cong and Zhuang Yan are a purely commercial marriage, the simplest interest relationship. It is well known in the circle that Shen Cong loves to play. He has restrained himself in the first few years of marriage. After facing a few years of lukewarm I don't even bother to restrain myself.
Zhuang Yan doesn't love Shen Cong, so she is indifferent to everything about him and focuses on her son.
Shen Cong doesn't love Zhuang Yan either, but he has a strong desire to control her. He wants to know Zhuang Yan's every move, from where she went a day to who she met, to what she ate and how every dish moved. Chopsticks several times.
Even Shen Keyan is under surveillance everywhere. From the age of ten, his every move is in the eyes of Shen Cong, whether at school or at home, but he can't show even the slightest dislike for Shen Cong, because all of these will Backlash to Zhuang Yan.
Shen Keyan has been like a proud son of heaven since he was a child, such a person will be more arrogant than his peers, his self-esteem does not allow himself to spread his weakness to anyone.
So in the eyes of outsiders, even though his eyes are getting colder day by day, and he doesn't like contact with people more day by day, Shen Keyan is still Shen Keyan, the eldest son of the Shen family who is better than all his peers in every way.
"That day, Shen Cong's favorite lover found out that he was pregnant. He was very happy but he was afraid that people outside would not take good care of him, so he took them home. Everyone's attention was on them, so I sneaked out with Song Xiao. Nobody cared at all."
Shen Ke said calmly: "The birthday party was very lively, Song Xiao invited many classmates to make me happy, and I was really happy."
That day, Shen Keyan finally understood why Zhuang Yan, who is so afraid of pain and loves beauty, would leave large and small scars on her body again and again, because the moment when the skin was cut open was really exciting, watching the bright red from the body Flow out slowly, as if those anxieties, restlessness and fears are slowly leaving your body.
He hid in the toilet cubicle of the KTV, watching the white floor slowly being dyed red with cold eyes. The 13-year-old Shen Keyan clearly realized that he was sick.
When he talked to Zhuang Yan, he was always gentle, telling her that it was not her fault, but it was different for him, if he was sick, he was sick, and Shen Keyan would not give himself any euphemistic excuses.
He fell in love with this kind of pleasure for a while. Shen Keyan's intelligence is not only reflected in his studies. His wounds are always in places where no one will notice. He can't die if he takes the medicine himself, because Zhuang Yan is still being tortured by Shen Cong. If he dies, Zhuang Yan may really be hopeless.
From the age of 13 to 15, Shen Keyan was sick secretly and presumptuously without telling everyone.
Until his uncle Zhuang Nan returned to China, Shen Cong had been playing with women undisguisedly since he was five years old. The dealer naturally knew about it for so many years, but they didn't say anything, naturally because they didn't dare to control it.
The Zhuang family still relied on the cooperation with the Shen family, they could only watch Zhuang Yan suffer, but Zhuang Nan didn't care about it, he rushed into the party and beat Shen Cong violently, and brought a group of people to smash the Shen family's gate. Zhuang Yan and Shen Keyan brought them back to the dealer together.
Shen Keyan knew that Zhuang Yan had something to rely on.
Although Shen Cong never thought of being a good father, he regarded Shen Keyan as the best successor. The Shen family's study would never be locked to him, so he had a lot of secrets about the Shen family. After confirming that Zhuang Nan was reliable, Shen Keyan told the other party completely what he knew.
After all, he has Shen Cong's blood on his body, he knows where Shen Cong's pain points are.
Zhuang Nan made a big move against the Shen family, causing quite a disturbance to the Shen family in just one year. Shen Cong finally realized that something was wrong, and offered to negotiate. Zhuang Nan was not polite, and the lion asked Shen Cong to let him go Blood, and then filed for divorce and custody of Shen Keyan.
"The divorce went smoothly. My uncle quickly arranged for a psychiatrist for my mother. After she got out of the cage of the Shen family, she gradually improved."
Once the obsession disappeared, Shen Keyan became even more unscrupulous in hurting himself, but he always concealed it very well so no one discovered it until Song Xiao returned to China that year.
The person in his arms was already in tears, Shen Keyan lowered his head and kissed the corner of his eyes: "Don't cry, it's all over, and you didn't read the case, I'm slowly getting better."
"Don't cry."
Shen Ke spoke softly, as if he didn't care about that time long ago, but the more he didn't care about Chi Yi, the more distressed he was.
The teenage Shen Keyan should still be a man of the hour in school, right?I don't know how many boys and girls like to admire him as a male god, but he was hurt by the closest person, and he took hurting himself as a relief. For so long, no one even noticed his abnormality, even if it was a day earlier, even if Just let him lose a scar?
"Why can you cry so much?" Shen Keyan simply hugged the person on his lap, and wrapped Chi Yi in his arms: "It really got better after seeing the doctor, but I'm not that resistant to seeing a psychiatrist .”
Is it because it doesn't matter?I finally found someone who cared about me, so what if I listened to what they said, did you think so?Chi Yi grieved, feeling resentment for the first time in his life.
Chi Yi buried her head in his neck, her tone trembling: "I don't like going to the hospital, is it because I'm afraid that my injuries will be discovered?"
The warm moisture made Shen Keyan's heart tremble suddenly, and the preset statement was changed.
"It's just that I simply don't like the smell of disinfectant," Shen Keyan said in a relaxed direction as much as possible: "During that time, my mother had to consult a family doctor every day and lived on various medicines. I hated seeing her painful expression. I even hate hospitals and medicine."
"The dealer hired a very powerful psychiatrist, and I cooperated very well, so my condition stabilized quickly. The reason why I continued to treat for so long is because I entered the entertainment industry."
Actor is a profession that needs emotional stimulation at any time, and Shen Keyan's experiential acting skills are easy to lose control when he first debuted, so he has been in touch with the doctor: "You see, I am actually very good now, right?"
What he said was fast and stable also lasted for three years.
"It's painful, isn't it? When I first received treatment." For three years, I had to undergo painful psychological counseling twice a month. I was obviously very unwilling, but because I was afraid that the people around me would worry, I obediently tore open my wound with my own hands. Sew it on again, is it possible to say it calmly now because it has been repeated so many times?Chi Yi felt like an executioner.
Why do you have to know the truth, why do you need to force him to confess, even if you don't know, can you still go on?
"It's not very painful, and I met you."
What Shen Ke said was the peace of Sui Sui three years ago, but Chi Yi understood it now.
"I should have appeared earlier," Chi Yi sniffled and rubbed against his chin: "I wish I could have met you sooner."
If he can meet Shen Keyan, he can accompany him through those painful years. If he can meet 13-year-old Shen Keyan, he can stop him from harming himself. If it was earlier... "I But I think this time is the best time." Shen Keyan laughed: "When I was 13, you were seven years old, and you were still in the first grade, right? Seeing such a scary person, maybe I just want to stay away from that person for the rest of my life Yes; when I was 12 years old, you were in the second year of middle school and you were passionate, maybe you would treat me well because of sympathy, then I would definitely be tempted, but I can't attack adults, right?"
"When I was 20, you were 14..." "I was going through the same pain as you at the age of 14," Chi Yi finished the sentence for him: "If we met at that time, we might only see each other. harm."
"You know it too, right?"
Chi Yi used interrogative sentences, but his tone was very firm. According to Shen Keyan's personality, if he didn't know what he wanted to confess, why would he expose his scars in such a direct way.
He was comforting him with his wound and testing him with it.
Comfort him not to be sad about the past, and test whether his love for him is enough to let him stay by his side at the risk of having a lover whose emotions may explode at any time.
Chi Yi put his arms around Shen Keyan's neck: "I promise."
A promise to fulfill all your wishes, a promise to stay with you, a promise to give you affection and connection, and a promise that I will love you.
Chi Yi was too sincere, making it impossible to hide his despicableness.
Shen Keyan remembered that when he first debuted, everyone would mention some minor flaws while praising his acting skills, but his
This kind of voice almost disappeared when the second movie was released, and until now everyone will say that he is a veritable actor.A veritable film king, not only can control his expressions and lines, but also learned how to figure out people's minds through role exercises, knowing how to be honest will leave room for the other party.
And Shen Keyan didn't want to give Chi Yi a way out.
Even out of pity and distress, he wanted Chi Yi to stay by his side forever.
So he chose to put himself in the leading position of this confession, tearing apart his past first, unfolding all the cruelty unabashedly in front of him, and asking him: Do you pity me?
Chi Yi felt distressed as he expected, but he was also very smart.
In such a short period of time, he saw his dark thoughts clearly, but told him plainly: I know how dirty your place is, but I want to grow flowers here.
Shen Keyan felt that the points of all the knives were double pierced into his heart at the same time, making him almost suffocate.
If he wasn't Shen Keyan like this, it would be great to meet Chi Yi who was before 14 years old.
He will definitely use up all his tenderness and love, exhaust all his warmth to embrace Chi Yi, and tell him: "I promise."
The author has something to say: today's update ~ I'm a little sad, the two cubs must be happy forever.
感谢在2021-11-1023：55：12～2021-11-1123：24：08期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦～感谢投出地雷的小天使：Stella＿9008131个；感谢灌溉营养液的小天使：冲动是魔鬼8瓶；叶凌雪1瓶；感谢小可爱们的支持，我会继续努力的，爱你们！