1000 meters in diameter

Chapter 1 Do I deserve to die for falling in love with a married man?

City Z, an ordinary summer night.

For dating software, weekends are often the most active time.Countless lonely men and women have been depressed in the company for five full days, and finally relax at the weekend.After taking a shower, put on the variety show, lie on the sofa and brush the apps with your phone.It's not necessarily all looking for someone to have sex, there are more people who simply flirt with each other or raise fish.

Of course, there are also quite special ones, using dating software as a tree hole, and posting the most secret inner confession to the same-sex dating forum when you are so comfortable on Saturday night.

Tonight, there is such a post on the first section of the forum——

[Title] I have been dating my boyfriend for two years and found out that he is married. Do I deserve to die?

[From] Ning

I met my current boyfriend two years ago.

Let me talk about my situation first.I am from the province of S. Three years ago, at the request of my parents, I went abroad to study business, and I went to Paris by myself.My English is average, and my French is even worse.At the beginning, I was far away from my family and friends, and when I got there, I didn’t know anyone. In addition, I was relatively introverted, and sometimes I couldn’t speak two words a day, like a mute.

It was at this time when I was extremely lonely in my heart that I met him.He is six years older than me. He is an engineer in a communication company. I don't know his position, but he is probably a manager. He was sent to Paris by the company.

He speaks French very well, is very mature, and takes special care of me.At the beginning, he regarded me as my younger brother, and I would tell him when I had problems on my mind, and I would go to him when I quarreled with my parents.The company rented a house for him, and he would cook for me in the apartment. My friends sent me all the food from all over the country, saying that I was studying hard and needed to supplement nutrition.

It is impossible not to fall in that situation.

I have no relatives in Paris, and he is my relative.Five months after we met, he celebrated my birthday. On that day, I drank and confessed my love to him drunkenly.

"I love you and I don't want to be a brother or brother anymore."

I say so.

As soon as I said it, I regretted it. I was afraid that I would scare him, and that he would never talk to me again.In fact, I still wanted to kiss him a little bit, but I didn't dare to act rashly, for fear that he would hit me (he is quite strong and can hug me with one hand).

I confessed with the mentality of dying and dying, but I didn't expect that God gave me a miracle, and he was the same.To be precise, he is double, as he said at the time.

He said that he also liked me a long time ago, and he didn't confess it because he thought I was too young and the future was uncertain, and he wanted to talk about it after I graduated.

I didn't expect that he had already thought about the future. I was very moved at the time, and I felt... I felt that it was him.

I offered it that night, but he didn't want it, he said he wouldn't touch me until I was ready.I believed it at the time, and later realized how naive I was.

Come here first, I'm going to eat.

[Time] 18:26

The post at 06:30 in the evening, one stone caused a thousand waves.

This same-sex forum implements a review and joining system. There are not many members in the group, but they are all genuinely gay.Usually there are only ten or twenty comments on a post, but today this post received a lot of replies.

Everyone is idle, some are waiting for the next article, some suspect that the writer is fishing, and some even want to see the photo of the poster. Of course, they are more curious about the direction of the story.After all, the word "married" in the title is enough to arouse everyone's curiosity.

An hour later, the landlord finally came back.

[From] Ning:

Excuse me, I just finished washing the dishes, let's move on.

After formalizing the relationship, the loneliest and boring school life suddenly became very promising.I will go to his house every Wednesday and Friday, and go back to school on Sunday.He is busy with work, comes home late, and sometimes has to work overtime in the middle of the night.I learned how to cook for him, and I didn't bother him when he was working. I learned by myself, and when I was tired, I would help him clean the house.

He treats me very well, no matter where I go to eat, he never asks me to pay for it, never forgets to give me presents on holidays and birthdays, and he will let me sit on his lap and kiss me desperately when he is working.I can feel that he loves me very much.

But he has always refused to have sex with me.You can kiss, you can use your mouth, you can use your hands, but you just don't want to come in.I pestered him more than once, saying that I was ready.Really, I bought a set, watched movies to study, and even did my own preparations, but he still refused.

He said he cherished my first time and wanted to do it after meeting my parents (I was out and he said he was too).

It's not a big deal though, because I really love him.At that time, I felt that I was the happiest person in the world. I thought about it countless times, imagined the future with him, thought about spending a lifetime with him, and wanted my parents to meet him as soon as possible, so it was settled. .

It's a pity that the good times didn't last long. When we were together for a year and a half, he suddenly said that he wanted to separate from me. The reason he gave was that he was going back to China, and the long-distance relationship would not last long.

Breaking up was like a bolt from the blue for me. I couldn't accept it. I cried and begged him to wait for me for another six months, but he still left.For the next six months, I suffered from insomnia almost every night. I missed him very much. I didn’t want any future or future. I just wanted to continue to be with him, so I flew back to China to find him as soon as I graduated.

My sudden appearance gave him a big surprise, and we got back together naturally.He rented a house for me, near his company, we lived together, and he talked sweetly to me every day.

This sweet dream woke up quickly.

It didn't take me long to find out that he wasn't single at all, he had been married for four and a half years, and his child was three years old, a boy.He said he didn't lie to me on purpose, but he couldn't resist the temptation of true love.There are three kinds of unfilial piety, the biggest is to have no offspring. He is a traditional man. When his parents asked him to marry him, he married him, but he never really loved his wife.

Only then did I realize that I had been lied to.Only then did I understand why he didn't touch me, because he was afraid, and he was afraid that once he touched me, I would pester him endlessly, and I would never be able to get rid of him again.

Facts have proved that he is very accurate in judging people. I am just so stupid and can't figure it out.I know he has a wife, but I still can't help seeing him, and when he leaves, I can't help thinking about him, and I still imagine that he can divorce and be with me forever.

We had another big fight yesterday.I asked him if he would get a divorce, but he didn't say anything, probably that was the answer.

His world is so big, he has a job, a wife, and a son. As for me, I only have a rented house.I don't even have him.

He asked me to go abroad, find a job, and visit me as soon as he was free, so that his wife wouldn't find out.I understood what he meant, he wanted me to continue sneaking with him.

I don't want to be like this, but I have already come out for him. My family is gone, my parents are gone, my money is gone, so is my lover going to be gone now?

What should I do, who can teach me.

[Time] 19:45

This is a forum for gays, and the replies are naturally towards the same kind.

[From] Birds and Fish: Is there any more? (10.3km)

[From] Super Corgi: What to do depends on what you think. Ask yourself, are you willing to endure sacrifice for him?Follow your heart if you want to. (5.8km)

[From] bkdisniet123: You are a dinosaur, otherwise how could he rest assured that when you go abroad, you are not afraid that grass will grow on your head after a long time, ha ha. (6.5km)

[From] Ning replied to Birds and Fish: No more, that's all.

[From] Gentle Wind: Love needs tolerance, people are not sages, who can do nothing?In my opinion, if he pays public food and wages on time, doesn't his wife already get everything she wants?Landlord, you are very pitiful, really!You just want a true love, even though it makes you suffer.Come on, let's pursue true love! (3.3km)

[From] Fallen leaves return to their roots: Blessings!

[From] Schrödinger's Dog: Sir, can you tell me how you met him abroad?I am also abroad, and I have always wanted to make friends, but I have no reliable connections, urgent! (greater than 1000km)

[From] Looking for a partner: He will get married, but you won't?Let's find a Lala knot and see who can survive. (20.4km)

[From] Ning replied to Gentle Wind: Thank you, I'll think about it again.

[From] Ning replied: Thank you, but I don't want to get married.

Comments appear one after another, and the host is also replying slowly.

It can be seen that the landlord is a good-tempered, gentle and restrained person.If I hadn't been forced to a certain extent, I probably wouldn't have come here to post for help.

But 2 minutes later, such mildness was broken by a sharp new comment.

[From] Bridge to Bridge: silly fork. (less than 1.0km)

The author has something to say: This article is inspired by the Douban gay group and Blued, but the portrayal of the gay group is my personal understanding, and it is inevitable that there are inappropriate things, readers please forgive me.